


Blue Is Where The Heart Is

by ZoBerry



Series: All The Little Blue Babies [2]
Category: Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: Adventure, Developing Friendships, Developing Relationship, F/F, Fluff and Smut, Marriage - old age - lots of little blue children, Polyamory, Polygamy, Prequel, Romance, Smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-16
Updated: 2020-09-12
Packaged: 2021-03-03 20:21:03
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 25,804
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24761476
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ZoBerry/pseuds/ZoBerry
Summary: A prequel to La Vie En Bleu.We all know theyre getting together. But how does it all come to play?
Relationships: Female Shepard/Aria T'Loak, Female Shepard/Liara T'Soni, Female Shepard/Liara T'Soni/Shiala (Mass Effect)/Samara/Aria T'Loak/Tevos, Female Shepard/Shiala (Mass Effect), Female Shepard/Tevos, Samara/Female Shepard (Mass Effect)
Series: All The Little Blue Babies [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1742392
Comments: 1
Kudos: 26





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Yes cliffhanger. But the next chapter is already up so that's nice :)
> 
> I was thinking of a toss up with the title either "Blue Is Where The Heart Is" or "Blue is the Homiest Color" both are obviously a play on Home/ Heart/ Blue though one is a nod to a title of a movie. In the end, I went with this one for now since yeah lmao just wanted to share XD

“That was a hell of a ride Liara, if that’s how asari really do it, Shiara has been holding back - rightly so.”

“Hmmhmm, but….Shepard… do you know anything about asari pregnancy?”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Year 2185. First leaves of Autumn start to fall.  
> Liara stops by the Normandy after spending time as the Shadow Broker.
> 
> (Before ME3)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah ha! I hope you all gave me a chance after my super short chapter one XD
> 
> Explicit themes here - I suck at writing smut and it hurt my head so I hope it works out somehow haha

A warm body was pressed beside her, a familiar body she had missed for two whole years, looking at it now, it was silly they never consummated in the first place. She etched into her mind the moment that was now; a heavy, comforting arm was resting above her waist, enveloping her in a protective hold as soft wisps of warm air tickled her neck folds. A strong thigh was pressed against her as another was wrapped in between her own blue ones, the tan colored knee peeking out in between her own. 

Turning towards the body that enveloped her, Liara had to struggle slightly, Shepard was heavy, a weight she did not mind at the slightest, but the heave she had to do herself was something sorely out of practice. As she settled on facing Shepard, watching her beloved’s eyes stay close, her breathing coming out in peaceful snores and her nose twitching slightly as her finger danced across it - Liara could only smile.

“I miss this, us. Just like before when we first met, we would sleep together, hide against anyone in the Normandy when we decided to cuddle.” she whispered to the sleeping form, snuggling tightly and intertwining her slender legs against the human’s muscular ones. A blue hand came up to swipe the red hair from covering the face, trailing slightly behind the ear before settling to embrace behind the nape. “It’s so very difficult now isn’t it? Or maybe it’s always just been difficult. Our meeting together was fateful my love, and I could have lost you, so many times. But here you are - beside me, and … and even if I had tried to find someone to warm my bed in the past two years… I can never really stay. You have my heart Shepard, you have had my heart ever since you had saved me from the Prothean device. You have had my heart that I didn't know it had given itself away willingly, and as we fought together, got hurt together, lost friends, lost each other, laughed, remembered - I… I will always love you. I’ll scour the galaxies, fend of the worst of creatures, anything… I love you, Shepard… You will always have my heart.”

Liara sighed as she said words that she knew she should have spoken aloud, with a small raise of her body, she edged closer to the human lips, parting slightly to take a breath, though her mind spoke as if it had happened because she was already going in for a kiss. “Let me lose will- just this once, my love.” she whispered again. Her heart was thumping out of her chest as she drew nearer. Internally she chastised herself, it was not the first time she would ever kiss Shepard after all, but there she was, like a virgin, crying almost at the chance to give such a pure act.

When her lips softly planted along the human’s own, she could feel a dam break in her heart, but before she could remove her lips and choke a sob, strong muscular arms embraced tightly on her form, warm human fingers trailing slowly behind her back before cupping the back of her head, in an instant, the lips she kissed parted, and a tongue snaked out, licking her own, asking for entrance, trailing itself along her bottom lip. Desire, love, desperation sparked through her core. 

She gave what Shepard wanted, knowing full well that she had walked into this one on her own. She knew that the spectre would stop with just one word, but she herself wanted this - she could feel it, she had already poured out her heart, and again and again she could do that - but she wanted more. The dam had broken and she wanted more, to feel, to know that the human beside her would never leave her side, would never get lost, would never be flung to some far away planet unknown and leave her grasping at straws where to find her again.

“Liara…” she whispered her name with so much love, so much care, Liara only had one other person who spoke that way, and she was dead - dead because of the Reapers, and there was no chance in damnation that she would let this one die to them as well. Liara moved aggressively, hauling herself upwards to straddle the human down on the bed, they had never been in this position before, but she knew whatever she did was born out of love. Shepard would never ridicule her for any accidents she may have made. Looking down at the now awake human, she could see green eyes looking at her with such hunger, hunger that was obviously reflected on her own. Two chests breathed heavily, as two sets of hands held each body firm with need. Her blue ones held onto the soldier’s shoulders where multiple scarring matted until the tops of her arms while human ones held tightly against the softness of her sides.

Before the human mouth could move to speak, Liara bent down swiftly, pushing her chest into Shepard’s own as another battle of lips and tongue took place; this time, Shepard was much more commanding, holding onto the small of her back as another hand pressed against her ass, pulling her upwards. 

More than a minute had passed as they continued kissing, but this time, Shepard was the one to break the moment - Liara had to mewl, she wanted more, they had never been so intimate before. Again strong hands moved up to hold her shoulders, lifting her as if she were as light as an asari acolyte pistol. 

“Liara-” her love called again, the voice penetrating through the fog of desire that was still building inside her. “Are you sure about this? Fuck… your eyes are darkening…” Liara could barely see Shepard’s form now, she knew it was there - everything was in her head, she could see but not really, as if she was dreaming in her own. She could see Shepard’s hair, her eyes, her concern, her body, the way she breathed heavily, desire also painting her human features - but now, pre-meld, she could also smell the desire, feel the need, as if her sensitivity had heightened.

She knew that the signs of melding were apparent, the first time this had happened she was only there for the need, because she was stressed, losing Shepard once without even consummating their love - anger had turned into pleasure and then pain, but the act of melding was there as her then partner pushed into her and guided her fragile brokenness when the first wave of misplaced need was assuaged. 

“You have my heart Shepard.” she breathed again, this time louder, making sure she was heard, making sure she heard herself. “I lost you once, and I could have lost you again back on Illium when I was afraid to let out relationship continue - and I could have lost you after your mission in the Omega 4 relay, I could have lost you to the geth, to the alliance, to the husks, the collectors, mercenaries, Tela Vasir, I could have lost you, and I could still lose you so many times - but I won’t ever let that happen. Please don’t let it happen to you as well.”

Liara knew she was openly crying now, crying as she spoke the words and pressed butterfly kisses on the bare skin that was available through the tank top Shepard wore. The human was warm, much warmer than her as she kissed and licked the skin that was available. She could sense nothing but Shepard, feel nothing but her beloved’s hands moving on her body. Another moment passed before she could feel strong arms envelop her strategically and then she found herself on the warm bed where Shepard’s body was laid, and on top of her, strands of her tickling the sides of her face, was Shepard. Liara took one look at the green eyes before smiling coyly at the face framed by red hair. The asari wasted no time in locking her arms against Shepard’s back, pushing the spectre nearer as she moaned, soft, eager, - experienced lips trailed against her skin, leaving a fine film of wetness where it trailed, beside her neck, below her chin, around her collarbone and in between the valley of her breasts through her low cut sleepwear. 

She wrapped her legs against the human’s hips, pushing her deeper. “I want you Shepard. I want all of you.” she breathed again, “I want to feel you, I want to feel you - again - and again - and” her voice continued to mutter words against moans as the spectre continued her ministrations. Soon enough, Shepard’s clothes were strewn on the bed, and Liara was able to finally appreciate fully the strength that was in Commander Jane Shepard.

Liara watched as Shepard sat on her hind legs, mindfully avoiding putting the weight on the asari as the human took hold of the edge of her top and removed the garment in one swift movement. Under the tank top was the slightly mangled dog tags she retrieved from Shepard’s - previous very mangled body. 

The dog tags fell as a soft clink just above the valley of the human breasts, an enticing look at the overall visage of strength and command. LIara took the time to curl herself upwards, sitting down as Shepard let herself adjust so that they would be almost on height with each other. Softly, Liara placed her hands on the human shoulders, once again skimming her fingers along the warm skin and smattering of scars and freckles that were available. Unlike Shepard’s shoulders that were filled with grazing shots and scars, her chest was almost immaculate if not for the obvious cybernetics from Cerberus that pulsed a faint orange light. Her fingers followed her eyes, trailing lower and touching more scars that scattered along her loves’ slacked stomach. 

Liara giggled.

“You gotta tell me why you laughed or I might cover up.” Shepard grinned down at the exploring asari. Liara looked up, the giggle a catalyst into receding her blackening meld back to normal. 

“You have gotten a little pudgy.” she said, holding to pinch a little flab that was Shepard’s stomach. Back then during the events of the first Normandy, when they had slept and switched spooning positions, Shepard’s stomach had always been taut- the same goes when their armor needed to be changed and the like - but it seemed even though the spectre was still busy, there seemed to have been less stress while she was under Cerberus. The thought now made Liara war against being both happy and sad for the predicament. 

Shepard herself could feel the change in the air, and with loving hands, she held Liara’s chin with one hand and raised the asari head to meet her eyes. With a soft peck on the purple lips “well, I could gain my full abs back so you wouldn’t need to kick yourself for not licking them when they were primed and fresh.” she grinned, trying to ease the situation.

Liara appreciated the lightness in tone, before she could skim her hands again on the skin, Shepard moved her chin again, the human’s face shielded as she asked. “Are you sure you want to do this Liara?” she asked again, always so caring, so understanding. Liara’s only answer was to smile sweetly as she slowly let her head down and take one relaxed nipple into her mouth.

The first contact was a complete success, if Shepard’s hiss was anything to go by it. Liara swirled her tongue against the bud, willing it to tighten as the other rejected breast was given love by her fingers, again the first tell tale signs of melding tickled through her brain, she could now feel Shepard’s own desire, coming onto her in erratic crashing waves, water trying not to spill over, but that wasn’t what she wanted - she wanted this first time to be every bit as good as it could be. Liara knew it was going to be better than any sexual interaction she had ever had - and she knew not of all of Shepard’s activities - but she wanted the spectre to remember it.

What she didn’t notice was that she was now also completely naked, somewhere along the lines of her throes of passion, she had not noticed that Shepard - or her - had already thrown away all of their clothes, even the dog tags that Shepard had kept wearing after their first meeting on Illium - was somewhere on the bed - or the floor. Kisses and licks turned into nips, and breathing turned into full moans as both bodies slithered along the sheets of the bed, pushing against each other, wanting more of what could be given.

When Shepard had dropped her head from kissing her - and the weight of the human body left her, Liara almost cried, but then the cry that escaped her throat was much much different as what seemed to be expert fingers tickled through her azure, petting them as if willing to open -and what could she do? Open it she did as her legs pulled towards her, giving the human access to her core. Liara squirmed at the breath that was so close to her being, she could feel wetness seep out- and even as her eyes turned closer to full black, a part of her mind continued to work - she knew Shepard had been with the asari consort in the Citadel, she knew that the commander had a thing for her race - but how much did Shepard know? How good would she be? Would it be better than an asari who knew what they wanted as a race? 

Continuous streams of thought enveloped her as much as the desire did - but when one very hard and wet appendage latched onto her opening- all concerns and curiousness were replaced with a blinding desire.

* * *

When Shepard saw the blue that she knew would captivate her from the start, she couldn’t help but salivate at how delicious Liara looked. In truth, she had had more than her fair share of asari’s, but Liara was different, because Liara was not just one asari in the number of her past, she cared for the blue beauty - had been with her for what felt longer than even most friendships, been with her through thick and thin, in health and in near death situations, dirtied, bloodied. Sure she was smitten as fuck when she first saw the asari trapped in the prothean security device, even going as far as thinking of very naughty things at the T pose asari hanging mid air - but Shepard had always kept her calm, wanting to know more about her than anything in the world, even her fornax collection could never satiate her the way Liara would.

That proved the same even as they decided to stay in a non-carnal relationship. Deciding that they had time to take it slow and just revel in each other’s care. At first they had spent many waking hours together- to the point where more than once Shepard had to ‘accidentally’ get grazed and the like - and conveniently forget her medigel - just so she could stay in Dr Chakwas’ med bay and spend time with the asari as her wounds healed. When they had faced the Rachni Queen, and ultimately Matriarch Benezia - Shepard had found Liara a mess in the med bay, locking herself inside as much as she could until Shepard herself had pushed to use her position to get the door open - Liara had not eaten for more than 24 hours that time - and she had carried the still crying and fetal positioned Liara towards her room where she had nursed her. 

Every time after that, Liara had moved to work in the med bay but slept in her quarters, even though at first she knew the asari tried ever so carefully to not be noticed by the team - it was only due to everyone else’s - even Ashley’s distaste did Liara find the strength to keep coming back. Every night after that, Shepard was content to stay beside the asari, sleeping together, talking together, comforting each other. 

At least - until the collectors came.

* * *

“Shepard?” Liara whispered as a skilled tongue continued to languidly caress her inner folds. 

A questioning hmmm came from below her as Shepard continued to suck and taste, and Liara could feel the love and very slow torture that the human appendage gave her, but if she were honest, Shepard was taking her time a little too well, and the rising need in her body was already going above the limits. 

“Please take me.” Liara moaned, trying to push her pelvis higher towards the already very drenched mouth that continued to suckle and tease. 

“Hmm but I’m having so much fun here Liara.” Shepard said, giving the clit one strong flick before turning her attention back to a very peaceful meal. 

Liara could feel as if she was an endless waterfall, and the wetness that was already crawling upon the crack of her ass was testament that the bed was fully soaked - she knew she had a lot of fluids, much more than other asari she had known of - or heard of - but it was crazy how Shepard had yet to take care, how strong was this human’s will?

“If you don’t take me now, I’m going to stassis you somewhere and pleasure myself without you.” Liara threatened, showing she was serious by letting wisps of her biotics crackle on her hands. The threat was only met with a chuckle that vibrated from the humans lips to her mound - making her once again squirm. Deftly, she felt rather than saw Shepard move upwards, the human taking both of her hands in hers before pinning both her hands together with one above her head, she could feel Shepard’s knee on her azure, touching the folds, being soaked upon the continuous waves of desire that radiated from her.

With a chuckle that shot another sense of carnality to her core Shepard bent down, placing a very drenched mouth and chin over her lips.

“Kiss me then.” Liara could hear the command.

A euphoric sense enveloped her as Liara willingly complied, opening her mouth and letting her taste envelop her, there was something erotic about the display, being under the human, her hands tied by one strong arm, holding her in place, knees situated perfectly against her azure, also keeping her in place yet giving her pleasure as she manually moved herself over it, lips that tasted like her and her beloved on her own tongue, while Shepard’s free hand trailed over her skin, touching her aching nipples and trailing along the little senstive scales near her waist.

It was electrifying.

“Please Shepard. I need -”

“What do you need, Liara?” the human breathed at her,moving deftly to remove the knee from her mound yet kept the hold on her hands above her head tight - “Tell me what do you need.”

“You. I need you Shepard. Please - take me, you already have me. All of me - so please… Please take me - meld with me.`` The last three words were said with such ache and need that LIara finally released a cry when Shepard placed her forehead against hers, an unspoken signal of permission as Liara flooded her desire back into the human’s mind.

It was the first time she would ever go to the depths of Shepard’s mind in carnal form. Although they had melded before, it was purely for knowledge, and the last time it had happened was already more than two years ago before the collector ship annihilated the first Normandy. Even when they had seen each other on Illium and shared stories - they had never melded even for information. Mostly because Liara was afraid, afraid at what Shepard herself would find - and afraid that in the end of it all, even with Cerberus and their absurdly expensive Lazarus Project, the mind that would meet hers would not be the familiar mind that she knew of Shepard.

Now though, now she knew exactly how wrong she was, despite the small physical difference that she could feel with her melding, LIara knew that the psyche that greeted her was no other than Shepard. It was familiar- safe, but now it was also burning, a similar desire to one she had felt, a desire that was controlled yet so eager, Shepard's mind was clear, clearer even than when they first had shared information. 

_I got better._ Shepard spoke in her mind.

If Liara was shocked, then the meld would not have let her hide that fact.

 _Not to be the braggart in the room - but I know how to pleasure the most beautiful race in the species._ Liara could even feel the smirk that both was in the head, and on the lips that played on her neck.

 _“You are incredible Shepard.”_ Liara said along the meld, truly at awe at how Shepard already knew how to speak with her, how clear the mind was, how it was filled with love, carnality and peace - it was as if cutting through butter with a hot knife, the transition in the meld was so smooth it almost felt like she was melding with another asari. Shepard even knew how to partition her mind to keep the depths of real life tucked away and only keep the pleasant thoughts in easy access.

_Then maybe this will make it more incredible?_

Liara saw stars, for just as Shepard said so, Liara could feel more than enough to make her burst. Within the few seconds, her brain was being flooded with so many sexual positions that made her body clench, some she was able to discern that came from fornax - magazine and video equivalent - but the delicious thing that she could see what that in every one of the asari position she saw - she could see herself as the starring persona. 

In the meld, she could see different flickering images, some was of herself on the CIC, in the disinfecting area, in the cockpit- all being ravaged and fucked by the strong woman that was holding her down. Shepard continued to burn her mind with such delicious thoughts that when a certain image filled her head, she couldn’t help but cry out.

Outside the meld, Shepards fingers worked with fervor - halfway through her barrage in Liara’s senses, she had already let the asari hands go as she used one hand to go under the asari’s neck while her other hand lifted Liara’s left leg up on her shoulder, from there, Shepard snaked her arm in between the asari’s blue legs and pumped her fingers inside, expertly seeking the asari version of their clitoris in the deep azure, as she pumped her fingers inside, reveling in the squelching sounds and tightness that kept on giving - she kept pushing to keep Liara’s mind stimulated as well. 

When she could feel that Liara was truly about to let go, Shepard took the time to send into her one of her deepest fantasies, and that was of her very first reaction upon seeing Liara trapped in the Prothean shield.

At first Shepard was unsure if it would even be right to show it, but then again, the moment had already presented itself after all, and when Shepard let Liara see what she would do to her given the chance, all up in stassis, naked, mewling and dripping two feet above the ground, the spectre knew it was the correct way to go, feeling the asari beneath her buck erratically as she continued on with pressing her fingers deep inside, creating a come hither motion with her two fingers as Liara screamed both in the physical plain and the meld.

When finally Liara had stopped, Shepard could still feel the cum dripping from the wet azure, it felt like she was just getting started but she wanted to make sure Liara was okay - she had been coming non stop for a while, from the little ones that their foreplay gave to this big one that finally emerged.

What Shepard didn’t know what that she was only sucked in a false sense of thought, as when Liara’s eyes opened, it was still as black as a starless night, and it didn’t even take a full smirk until Liara was once again in her head- and this time, physically, Shepard was pushed back against the bed as Liara’ slithered down her body and took no mercy unleashing her blue tongue on her clit.

If there was something to be said about Liara, she was an ardent lover, as noisy as her azure was - the same as how her lips and mouth worked. Shepard could hear the non-stop slurping that made her aware how much Liara was into the act of love making.

 _“When I tasted myself on you, I knew I wanted to taste more than just your mouth Shepard.”_ Liara said in the meld. “ _I knew I wanted more of you, all of you, I want to take this chance to give myself fully to you Shepard, everything - I meant what I said - everything I said, I am yours, I love you, everything you are, everything you do - I’m sorry I wasn’ there for you - I’m sorry I was afraid, but this time - this time I know I’ll be there -just as much as you were there for me - and always believed in me. Shepard. Shepard please. I love you. I love--”_

Shepard could not stop the onslaught of feelings that was in Liara’s pure thoughts, just as Liara controlled the meld and pushed images of love and acceptance, guilt and redemption, care and need - into her own psyche, the onslaught of delicious sensation was the same as she could feel clumsy - but ever so enthusiastic tongue and lips on her nether regions, tongue and lips that were then joined in by slender fingers that hooked inside her - they weren’t as skillful as other asari had been when Shepard had their moments with them - but Liara’s meld and affection and everything else was more than enough to take her over the edge.

* * *

The pair woke up to a slightly irate Miranda.

When the door of the captain’s quarters opened, Liara woke up quickly and scampered to tuck both she and Shepard under the scrutinizing gaze of the Normandy 2.0’s XO gave them. A feat that was made all the more embarrassing when she realized that the covers were very much trapped under Shepard’s musculature form and even she couldn’t hide herself.

A full squeal erupted from her when Miranda was now on the foot of the bed, unashamedly looking at Shepard before giving her a small smirk and a nod of good morning - the face confused Liara because as quick as it came, the smirk turned once again into irateness as Miranda threw a non-lethal biotic shock at the bare bum of the commander.

“Fuck I’m up!” Shepard cried as she sat up quickly, turning her head curiously at Liara before green eyes comically enlarged upon realizing that there was another person in the room. In a not so graceful way - Shepard lifted the tangle of covers away from her and wrapped the duvet over Liara - before turning her attention back to the irate prodigy.

“Good morning Miranda.” Shepard greeted her with a smile - as if she wasn’t buck naked with another similarly naked person on the bed. 

LIara watched as Shepard grabbed her tank top and put it on - effectively giving her some sort of thinly veiled propriety as Miranda moved to speak. 

“Good morning your own buttocks Shepard, it’s already past the lunch hour. If I didn’t love you as a friend I would never have woken you up and laughed at your face as you realized Samara had already left.”

“What- Samara left?” Shepard said incredulously, the shorts she was about to wear falling from her hands and back down on the floor.

Miranda spared a look at her, still curled up with the duvet to protect whatever modesty she had of herself. Shepard may feel like she had nothing to hide from MIranda- given that she had definitely already been under the scrutiny of the Cerberus prodigy during the commander’s time in the Lazarus project, but she herself was different altogether. 

“You know Doctor T’soni - Liara, I’ll call you Liara okay? You probably shagged the brain out of this spectre - one, she always wakes up before 700 hours, two, she never needed me to repeat something as simple as what I said.” 

With a shrug, Miranda threw a now somewhat dressed commander a look before turning back to head out the door.

When Miranda had left, Shepard turned towards Liara with a half smile, scratching behind her head as if in coy apology. “Sorry about that - Miranda and I have become close - and she’s not one for being proper when she knew she has power over the situation - but it’s just that.” 

Shepard moved to stand on the other side of the bed where Liara was, and the asari let her give her a sort of good morning - or rather good afternoon wake up kiss. Liara slightly melted into the act, but the concern that furrowed Shepard’s brow was another concern entirely.

“So to what Miranda said…” Shepard started, unsure how to break the point about Samara being that important to warrant a violent wake up call. “I guess you have questions.

Liara smiled - a smile unseen by Shepard who was looking at the ground as if unsure what to say. With deft hands, she lifted the spectre’s face to look into her eyes, she willed her love to radiate towards the human, understanding more than words can say - especially due to the meld. “I do have questions, but the night we had also gave me answers Shepard. It’s alright. After all, I think I did see you with - I believe - Shiala - in one of your images, and… if I’m right - which I truly think I am, there was a certain image of me dancing on a pole while you and a certain Pirate Queen were watching.”

Shepard’s eyes swiftly turned towards her own, and Liara had to stifle a laugh at the very caught look her beloved had. “Come on now, a limited first edition asari feature Fornax, two dozen asari porn magazines and an extranet history of more than just the usual is enough for me to understand. I am the Shadow Broken after all.” Liara gave the still shocked human a quick peck to lips before standing up, sheet and all as she walked towards the bathroom.

Slyly, Liara let the sheet half fall, letting her back be seen as she turned slightly towards the human still by the floor of the bed, “If you want, we can re-enact one of those you seem fond of while bathing?”

That was enough to get the commander to shake off her shock. In an instant, Shepard was already up and beside her, removing the sheet from her body and pinning her back against the cold glass of the aquariums walls. 

When they were finally clean -after a longer than usual bath, Shepard had to watch a now jittery Liara - it seemed that just as they finished wearing their usual clothing, Liara’s wilder side had turned back into the shy little scientist she once was. Sure Shepard still loved it, heck, scientist in the streets, banshee in the sheets after all. It felt as if there was something else bothering the blue beauty. So she did what she could do, try to break the ice.

“That was a hell of a ride Liara, if that’s how asari do it, Shiara has been holding back - rightly so.” Shepard chuckled, remembering the moment slightly and knowing that Liara was actually there waiting for her outside the consorts place when it all happened.

Liara herself was still in a bit of a daze, in a usual manner that Shepard was aware of, notably when Liara was to speak in a professional manner, she asked - tuning out anything that Shepard had said earlier.

“Hmmhmm, Shepard… do you know anything about asari pregnancy?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Edit. lmao idk why my fingers typed architect as liara's job. welp sorry. corrected it.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Year 2185, same day as previous chapter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oooh a new chapter that fast, then im gone again.
> 
> heads up. i tbh don't know how to take this fic as, seriously or a little cuckoo. So please give me a lil bit of slack since I'm indecisive like that :(
> 
> Warning: Also, pregnancy talk. Just so you all know what you're getting into.

Shepard pulled Liara back to her as the asari moved to leave. During the whole event of their talk, Liara had already fixed herself to a T and Shepard was left still agog, an inner sleeveless shirt on her as a towel wrapped around her waist to cover her modesty. There were many things Shepard was good at, and she was confident about them - she knew how to make a quick decision on unwarranted events, she knew how to make solid decision even at the worst moments - she knew how to diffuse an escalating problem with her charm and even ruthlessness, but this - whatever this was - was something she was not good at. Heck, she wasn’t even ready for it in the first place.

“You’re pregnant?” she asked in shock still- her voice rising dangerously at the admission. When Shepard woke up that morning, butt slightly sore from Miranda’s biotics, she never dreamed that the night before - all six hours of desire and love - would have borne fruit. 

“I know it’s a bad time - and I---”

“Of course it’s a bad time! I… alright, I’ll bite - how do asari get pregnant anyway? I mean.. I’ve been with what? A do… a handful and none of them got pregnant! Or what if they are oh god---” the readhead now paced along the short expanse of the room, Liara was pregnant, she couldn’t believe it - she loved LIara, fuck that, but at a time like this? It was irresponsible, it was crazy, she wasn’t even an alliance, she was wanted. She was dead for god sakes and now she was gonna be a dad? Right in the middle of an incoming war, who knew when the strike was going to occur?

A part of Liara felt slightly miffed at the possibility that Shepard was to father other children that were not hers- or rather were not of emotional value - but she shrugged that internalized thought away as she tried to focus on the rising tension that was now. 

“It was an accident - I…” Liara knew she was too young, and what happened was as much as humans could call, a hole in the latex. But she had learned about the tell tale signs of asari pregnancy, and somewhere along the throes of passion, she was unable to hide how much she loved the human in front of her that her feelings had blossomed and she knew she would have a child in her womb. “What do you want to do Shepard?” she then asked, scared for what the answer would be, suddenly scared that things would change - although she would ultimately understood if Shepard decided to run off with whoever, or that the human might turn away, she hoped not she hoped-

“It’s a mistake.” Shepard said plainly, turning her back towards the asari before thumbing through the available shipwear- “I love you Liara. But it’s too soon and we’re at war and you’re the Shadow Broker - I don’t want to bring a child into the world that---” her breath hitched upon her throat, remembering what she and Liara had just said along their night of revelry. 

A hand touched the bare of her shoulder, one that had yet been covered up by the button up top she was wearing, “Tell me… what do you want?” The words spoken behind her were the very same words spoken during their lovemaking. “Has it changed?” Shepard could hear Liara, but she could sense that the asari was trying her best to hold it together. Something she sorely lacked doing right now. 

“It hasn’t changed Liara.” she whispered to her clothes, slumping her shoulders as the blue hand stayed. “Marriage… old age… a lot of little blue children. That’s all I want.” minutely, she turned to move and look at the woman that she thought she had lost - again, Shepard let the hand from her shoulders trail up towards her cheek, cradling it, giving it warmth and a home. “I want more really but… how can we even---”

The blue hand shifted, and a finger placed itself on her mouth, and even though Shepard’s first thought was to lick it, the obviously trembling finger stopped her. “I do not want to lose this life inside me, Shepard, no matter what you say.” Liara’s whole body now visibly shook, as if she herself was holding on to something that had barely just begun forming. “But if you don’t want her---”

The pain in the redhead’s eyes surprised the asari as two strong, ruggled hands grasped her in a forceful hug. Her only words were from the voice of her beloved, muffled against human her and her neck folds. “I can’t promise Liara. I will love them sure, whoever they are, but I can’t… I can’t even focus on my team. This... what if ---” Shepard didn’t think that losing the child - even though technically maybe it wasn’t even a fetus from an asari point of view really - was an option, but she couldn’t help but think of all the problems it would cause. Heck, Liara didn’t even have a proper bed for the first few days of being a Shadow Broker, the ship in Hagalaz wasn’t the best place to raise a child, there were so many thoughts and ---.

“It’s okay my love.” Liara spoke then, removing herself from the commander’s embrace. There was something about the asari that made Shepard feel cold, as Liara’s smile - though seemingly comforting, not really meeting her eyes. Blue hands held her own tan colored ones as LIara thumbed through her skin. “It’s going to take a while anyway for this to manifest in truly any problematic way - I’ll go back to the base, you take care of the rest of your crew. When you’re done and feeling better, we can talk again. I know I need to sort things out for myself too.”

Shepard watched the already- dressed Liara leave the captain’s quarters - the door almost closing behind her before Shepard had the chance to shout. “You’ll be safe there right?!” she croaked out.

Liara could only smile sadly, unseen by Shepard before she turned around halfway, gracing the commander with one of reassurance before speaking. “I’ll be safe Shepard, I know you’ll see to that.” With a final reassuring smile, Liara left the cockpit, and minutes after - as she knew the ship started moving again and they left the system of Hagalaz to FTL to a nearby relay, she could hear Miranda’s caller tone blaring through her terminal.

* * *

The FTL from Hagalaz’ system to the Pelion system in the Nimbus cluster was going to take them a few hours. The time given would be enough to at least have one more bonding in place before a new hole excavated her heart. The trip down the third floor - one floor below her had been the most eventful trip of her whole Normandy 2.0’s life. Finally getting out of the captain’s cabin, she was a little in shock at seeing Garrus stop at her floor, mandibles fluttering and his flange deepening as he tried - unsuccessfully to alleviate her feelings on the matter with small talk. She appreciated the act though - even if it did make her end up feeling more queasy.

When the elevator doors opened Tali hugged her - which was not unusual, given that now they’ve been closer than ever - but maybe it was just her nerves? Surely Liara wouldn’t have spoken to everyone about what happened between them. She spared a look at Garrus at that - Garrus couldn’t keep a secret to save his life - so it wasn’t about Liara. 

Before she turned the corner - Jack was there, arguing with Jacob about the use of biotics - which was curious as normally it would have been Miranda - then Grunt came out of the men’s room - Mordin following suit as Chakwas excited the crew room fronting it, and although Grunt just grunted his greeting- Mordin and Chakwas looked at her almost knowingly. 

With a deep breath at the closed doors - Shepard then understood that it wasn’t Liara- and it was all for her. Or she was just overthinking things.

The door slid open, the sight that greeted her never ceased to amaze her, if Liara had given her dirty thoughts the very first time she saw her trapped in the prothean device, it was elevated tenfold when she was what Samara could do with her foot. Shepard could only gurgle at the thought. 

“Your thoughts are not very hard to read Shepard.” The matron asari said with no hint of familiarity. To the untrained - unused ears, it was as if Samara cared little - or even saw Shepard nothing more than a passer by. But those in the 2.0 knew differently, and they there was a reason Miranda had called her up so violently and how Garrus and Tali tried to assuage her - even Chakwas and Mordin. Although her two dextro best friend’s knew about her little asari kink, it was obvious to everyone else that instantly, Shepard had been starstruck by the justicar. 

She could remember being given by Thane a handkerchief as she was visibly salivating at how Samara floated down the ground. How her team saw her gush and go crazy, be young and in love. How Garrus saw her both engaging with Afterlife asari because of Samara -and also not hooking up with them - because of Samara. How Miranda knew that for a good solid two months, Shepard stopped visiting Afterlife unless it was solely for work given that the commander wanted the justicar to know how serious she was - something that after a while Samara had actually chuckled at.

> _ “You do not need to put hold your desires Shepard. I am very flattered you think of me that way, and I meant what I said that I do believe in another time we could have together - more than happy together, but this is who I am now.”  _ Samara had told her, a fond yet sad smile gracing the older asari’s regal face as Shepard’s heart continued to crack. 
> 
> _ “I didn’t do it just for you Samara.” _ the commander responded.  _ “I did it for me too. I want you to know that what I feel for you is real, and I respect you and ---” _ Delicious teal fingers poised itself just an inch away from her lips, effectively cutting her off. 
> 
> _ “You are a beautiful human Shepard. Even if I shall live longer yet - I know I will never find another human like you. I know what you feel for me is real and true, and I have seen you practice control not many of your kind follow through. So if anything, live- be free… I trust you Jane.” _

Back in the observatory, Shepard had to chuckle. “Well, I’ve been thinking of other things Samara, care to wager?” Shepard shot the asari a challenging look- although they have both settled into a peaceful state of friendship, there was no doubt in her heart that she will forever hold a burning torch for the enigmatic justicar.

She watched as Samara ever so slightly tilted her head, a look that once again breathed life into her heart and stomped it back. “I trust you… Jane.” The triumphant look from the asari gave away the obvious answer from her face - the matron was right, she was just thinking about that specific moment in her past. If she knew more about mind melding- and if Samara wasn’t a justicar who had morals, Shepard would have thought that her companion would have been tricking her.

Shepard walked towards the older asari, “How do you seem to know what I’m thinking?” she asked curiously, sparing her an innocent glance.

Samara could only smile as she whispered words, low, full of feeling. “I have been in love as well.”

The commander watched as the asari did not meet her eyes. For whatever the answer or to whoever the answer was about - it was better she didn’t know. 

Samara on the other hand had let herself feel free while under Shepard’s care in the Normandy. She had enjoyed most of their time together - a beautiful fulfilling relationship that trumped many if not most of what she had in the past four centuries. Meeting with Shepard, sharing their stories, talking warrior to warrior - soul to soul, had tangled her in a web of feelings and emotions that she had long thought forgotten. The fact that Shepard was easily able to fill that hole in just a few short months was testament to how well they were for each other. But still, she knew it could not be - and although she would always play that moment of confession from the human in her mind - she knew that it would be just that. 

A memory.

The asari could feel the slight touches of the backs of Shepard’s battle calloused hands hover near her own, she knew that the human took their conversation about romance seriously, and even though Samara usually did not let herself - or Shepard fall into more physical manners, she let this one slide- given that she did not think that she would see Shepard again - or travel with her a very, very long time.

“Will I see you again?” The spectre asked, removing herself from her trail of thought. Samara internally smiled, if Shepard had accused her of mind-reading before, then the same could be said to this, as it seemed their every conversation while together had given them a bond of somehow, hearing what the other one has been thinking. It actually made my heart ache at the realization that if she just let it be so - they could work. But again, she knew Shepard was young, there was no doubt in her that Shepard could give her more than happiness, but would she - old as she was, give the human what she truly deserved? Give the savior of the citadel, hero to so many true happiness?

“I cannot answer that.” she said truthfully, the smile leaving her face to pose to a more neutral one. “If our paths cross, then at least I will not have to smite you. But then again, with your actions, I am sure I will never have to worry about doing so. I have already lost too many from my own hands.” 

Shepard watched the changes in the asari’s facial expression. Although she was used to how stoic the justicar could be, there was no doubt that the tell tale signs of emotion was there. To how Samara took a quick second to school her features, how her breathing became calm - measured- to how like now, there was a sudden drop in her tone that conveyed sadness. The spectre could only mourn for the justicar, losing her family - maybe even friends for the sake of the code. Even she knew if she was too questionable with her actions Samara would be serious in bringing her to a stop if not for the oath.

Both of them stayed on the floor again for the last few hours of their journey, spending time with each other in quiet bliss. Though sometimes visitors would come in to say their goodbyes - given how the justicar has somewhat also been cordial to them - friends even to a few - ultimately it would be Shepard and Samara staying in the spot. There was no awkward movements or thoughts, just a calm that they both shared and were used to ever since. 

When the mass relay of Osun finally appeared, they both knew it would only be a matter of minutes they would be planet side to Samara’s destination. It was there upon the coming realization that she may never see the justicar again did Shepard realize what they have not talked about - Liara. Liara was not mentioned even though technically the maiden asari and the human have rekindled their relationship not even a full day on.

She knew she had already told Samara about Liara - how she and the maiden were together and yet had cut it off shortly before meeting each other in Illium. How apart from seeing LIara on Illium for a simple task there was nothing else they did together. How she understood and give wide berth to Liara’s decision that two years of emptiness was just too vast to rekindle as fast as Shepard would have wanted. Even then, Shepard had opened up to the matron asari about her and Liara's past. A past that she thought would never return.

But Samara didn’t know about last night. Shepard realized that she had been so focused on Liara - then on Samara when the door opened that she had not remembered to at least ask about asari pregnancy. Even though at the back of her mind the spectre knew it would be a touchy subject - given that she understood some people may not understand as good as Liara how she showed her love. The sudden thoughts in her head was a little too anxiety inducing to just burst out loud - especially since they had already passed the mass relay and Samara’s stop was just a few more planets away. 

Opening her mouth, Shepard knew she missed her chance when the asari beside her stood up, ready to take her leave. “Will you join me?” Samara asked, her voice careful, poised - making Shepard blink in confusion before realizing that the asari had been in deep emotional thoughts as well. 

“Of course, to here and beyond.” she breathed, quickly jumping up - meaning what she said that she would go hell and high waters for one of the most amazing asari she had ever met - one that definitely captured her heart in more ways than one. Heck Samara could crush said heart with the heel of her shoe and Shepard would say ‘again’.

Once Samara had said her farewells to the rest of the crew-, she and Shepard stayed at the shuttle bay, waiting for an asari convoy to pick up the justicar. 

Shepard bit her lower lip, as she saw from the screens the incoming shuttle from the asari colony below. Samara was going to leave - she was going to leave her life with a big possibility that they would never cross each other again, what she felt for the justicar was more than just carnal, even though Shepard knew that alone could move mountains - she loved her, just as how - but still different as how Shepard loved Liara. 

Again Liara… and again Shepard kept the pressure on her lip, unknowingly drawing blood that the elder asari had quickly noticed. 

“Shepard…” she called, once, twice- before the human was able to turn her head towards her. “You are bleeding.”

“Ah fuck, no I…” Shepard watched as the shuttle bay door opened, slowly accepting the asari equivalent of a kodiak. “I love--- I…” The spectre stammered as she stared at the reflective gray eyes that captured her - but ultimately, she was sadly unable to convey words as a passenger from the shuttle emerged to greet them. She was only able to see Samara’s beautiful - ever so understanding eyes look at her for one more moment of softness before schooling her features back to normal and addressing the escort.

As Samara and the escort conversed with their formalities, Shepard used this time to compose herself. Willing herself to push and act like the commander that she was in front of other people.

When Samara turned towards her for one last goodbye, Shepard knew she was going to curl up in bed and cry - cry for Liara and their complicated relationship, cry for a woman that had technically been her soul mate - a soul mate she may never see again - cry for her inability to act now that she pressed against two separate loves and forced to think of one. 

The spectre was unaware of a coolish blue hand cup her cheek - the same cheek Liara had cupped earlier, instinctively, Shepard melted into the touch.

She focused her eyes once again, noting that the justicar's action was done in such a way that no one else but they would know what was happening. 

“Take care Shepard.” Samara whispered- moving her thumb across the bleeding lip before pulling her hand away. Shepard could see that the justicar also felt deeply, but she understood - oh how she did understand that duty came first. 

This time, Shepard couldn’t speak, didn’t know what to speak anymore. 

“Take care of the young doctor. I know you are both very fond of each other.” 

With a last, oh so bittersweet smile, Samara turned, taking only a few graceful steps into the shuttle and out of her life - without even one last look behind her.

* * *

Back in the third floor deck, Shepard decided to visit Miranda for a drink of wine to relax and discuss anything that needed to be discussed before she let herself succumb to the additional jumble of emotions that were in her head. 

Unfortunately she was unable to take the relaxing way out of her worries because just as Miranda's door opened, the prodigy had alerted her to a high priority call down in the CIC.

Quickly, Shepard jogged back to the elevators, going straight to her terminal as Kelly quickly reported  “It’s from Admiral Hackett of the Alliance, Commander.” Kelly said, surprise in her tone.

Shepard quickly checked her terminal, it seemed it wasn’t going to be so unfortunate after all. If she was going to be able to release her worries for the sake of a mission, then at least that would save her the tears and the hangover.

All the more of a fool she was though.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After editing a bit, I realized I have to disclaimer again; some actions may seem controversial (as if poly isn't lol), but some are also controversial in terms of pregnancy, love, wimpy actions etc. But again, there characters are all "human" / "humanized" so mistakes will be made, you could think Shepard is thick as fuck or cruel or childish, and that's that - that's how it is- and true, sure things get better (hence La Vie En Bleu) the journey is a lot more rocky. 
> 
> So yeah, just wanted to say that. Heck I know worst things are written in fanfictions, but I just wanted to be sure since I'm a soft little pudding inside hahahaha
> 
> also. this whole shebang is gonna have so much she / her.. I hope i don't write them interchangeably with characters :(


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Start of ME3. Shepard meets Liara again, finally.
> 
> How do they talk about the nugget in the archives?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I told myself I wasn't going to update any other story until I update this. Thank goodness it went past 2000 words at least.
> 
> *Note: I forgot that Autumn leaves usually fall on November(?), I don’t have the four seasons in my country so Fall automatically translated to September. Either way, by January - the New Year is greeted by the reapers and Arrival / Brig is finished. This is the start of ME3*

_ Year 2186, January _

The last time she saw Liara it was the middle of September while docking at Hagalaz. She would have stayed longer, but duty called. Hackett called - and then the pain of withdrawal from anything space and aliens and exploring came into play as she found herself stuck in the Alliance brig back in Vancouver. It wasn’t fun - and from left and right she had seen nothing in preparation for the inevitable. The Reapers.

Although there wasn’t much she could do - she tried, she tried to push Hackett and Anderson into strengthening the defenses, tried to talk to whoever would listen - tried to reach the committee earlier - yet to no avail. For months this went on and in the waking hours that were permitted, Shepard had continued on trying.

In the darkness of the night though, between the exhaustion of the day and the nightmares that plagued her, Shepard would lie still on the bed, eyes straight upwards thinking of the things that made her continue on. Continue despite the Alliance not giving her two shits, continue on despite the Council continuously ignoring her. Continue despite… continue despite starting to doubt herself.

And that would be her team. Those who fought with her and understood that there was something bigger than all of them combined coming towards and - obviously dangerous that had to be dealt with. 

That… and asari. 

“Oh god. Liara.”

Liara. 

Liara who was supposedly pregnant with their child, her child - and she couldn’t even explain it. She couldn’t tell anyone - not one soul about if. For fear of the scientists’ safety. Although technically with Liara’s network it would be almost impossible to spy on her compared to scenario with the spectre, Vasir… the threat would remain. What was Liara doing now? Was she eating well? Is she still stuck to her multitude of screens? Shouldn’t she have been there with the asari? Somehow? Maybe? Taking care of her? Who was taking care of Liara? Feron? Did Feron like Liara? Of course he did - but then ---.

Her brig days were spent with days on end of draining herself, in physical training, in drills, in teaching, in cleaning - whatever the Alliance would want of her and whatever else she could do to clear and tire her mind. 

Until one night after many more moments of sleepless nights, Shepard had finally succumbed, slipping down on the side of her door after another rigorous training and falling asleep.

_ “Hello again, Shepard.” _

_ “Oh. It’s you.” _

_ “It is. Should I take my leave?” _

_ “No… no, stay. It’s been a while... I’ve missed you.” _

_ “Thank you.” _

_ “Don’t you miss me?” _

_ “What do you think, Shepard?” _

_ “I’d like to say yes… but.” _

_ Shepard didn’t look up from where she was, slumped on the ground in a random hazy planet she couldn’t figure out where. But she knew that voice, it was a voice that invaded her dreams on many occasions. Ever since she had met the owner, that voice had stayed with her, comforted her both on her waking days and sleeping nights. _

_ “Can you stay with me for a little bit?” _

_ “As long as you want me to.” _

_ “You know i’d prefer forever.” _

_ The visitor smiled softly, before sitting in a meditative position beside her. Shepard could still not raise her head and look, but she knew in her dream that her visitor was beside her, sitting near - almost touching but not quite. _

_ “Thank you… Samara.” _

Shepard didn’t know how long she had been asleep - but when she woke up, it was still the black of night, looking at her omnitool, it wasn’t even 2300, a mere forty or so minutes since she entered her room. Still, the nap was a tad bit refreshing, a surprise she didn’t expect, and although she couldn’t remember the dream - she knew she had one and she had been at peace.

Lifting her body Shepard dedicated the energy given by the short nap to take a bath and freshen up - if she were lucky, she’d get her hair dry before her head fell on the pillow.

_ “Hey Shepard. You’re looking like a wreck.” _

“ _ Thanks I guess.” _

_ “Huh. If I knew you were going to be weak I wouldn’t have really come.” _

_ “You can’t fool me,” _

_ “I can’t. But you can sure fool yourself.” _

_ “What do you mean?” _

_ “Y’know Shepard. The galaxy isn’t going to die if you find a little bit of happiness.” _

_ “You mean if I finally give in and go for another of your little dancers again? I’ve had my fill. Probably went with all the good ones already.” _

_ “If you say so. But I didn’t give that idea.” _

_ “You kinda did.” _

_ “Whatever floats your jet, Shepard.” _

_ “You mean my boat?” _

_ “Sure.” _

_ ….. _

_ “What if I don’t want your dancers?” _

_ “Hm? You want Grizz?” _

_ “I want you.” _

_ “Oh very direct... Do you now?” _

_ Shepard felt like she was being cornered, hazy icy blue eyes stared at her, a purple body encircling her, as if stalking its prey. _

_ “You wanna reach the top just like that?” _

_ “I think I deserve it.” _

_ “You have gall. I guess I can give you points for that.” _

_ “Thanks.” _

_ “But that only gets you to my toes, commander.” _

_ The figure was nearing her, and although she knew it was a dream, Shepard couldn’t help but writhe, wanting to grasp the leather clad beauty in front of her but couldn’t move her hands, couldn’t move any part of her at all. _

_ The figure laughed, almost cruelly, but the faintest feel of lips near her ear made her tremble. _

_ “Who do you want Shepard? Make this answer count.” _

_ “You.” _

_ “Then don’t ‘think’ if you deserve me. Make it so.” _

Before anything raunchy happened in her dream, Shepard woke up again, feeling hot and flustered like never before. It had been ages since she had just tasted one of Aria’s talented girls, and although they will never fill the emotional need she had reserved for a few special asari - those girls were top notch and she was sure as hell - that no other place does their girl right if it wasn’t Afterlife.

“I need to get laid… It’s been months since Liara- no, no. I shouldn’t be thinking about Liara right now. Goddess I just need to get laid.”

For the third time that night, Shepard fell asleep again, knocking on whichever door in her dreams to let her in and let her sleep.

* * *

_ Year 2186, last week of January - Mars Archives, Mars _

“Liara…”

“Shepard, by the goddess you’re alive!”

Despite getting close and bloody with a group of Cerberus outside the shuttle area, that didn’t stop Shepard from accepting the curvy asari that threw herself at her, peppering her now helmet-less head with kisses and going for the tongue just as if they had never been apart in the first place. Without preamble, she raised Liara higher, letting the asari wrap her wonderfully lithe legs on her waist. Hungrily, she moved her hand from supporting the asari’s thighs to settling on the juncture near the delicious blue bum she always dreamed of. Their kiss was heavy, messy, but oh so very sweet - like honeycomb, her favorite treat.

There was nothing else in the thought - just deep delicious kisses that threatened to undo her very core. Liara always felt like home and Shepard knew she’d be coming back and back and back again. Just like how they both kept finding each other.

“Skipper?” Ashley spoke from beside her, “Storm’s coming in, we gotta move. Hi Liara.” Ashley said, giving a polite but knowing smile from behind them.    
  


> _ Year 2183 - Somewhere in Artemis Tau _
> 
> _ Not even minutes after their departure from Therum, the whole of the Normandy was staring at their little group a little bit more intently than usual. Ashley Williams found herself used to the staring men, it was normal during her time at the training academy, but she couldn’t understand why they were exactly staring now. _
> 
> _ It then dawned on her - just as they entered the elevators to pass the mass hall and after the sixth pair of crewmen started whispering - that it was the asari scientist they were talking about.  _
> 
> _ ‘Of course it is’ she thought, a tick in her jaw. No one could resist the asari, at least that’s how the saying goes. To her they were weird, just as human as they could be but with scales, and no hair. It was bizarre, just slightly less than the other species - but she couldn’t understand their appeal.  _
> 
> _ She watched the commander enter the med bay with the asari, Liara - Dr Chakwas has yet to return from the bathroom, so Ashley let herself stay at the corridor near the med bay, waiting for her turn.  _
> 
> _ From one of the doors opening, she heard Doctor Chakwas and Kaidan chat- as if old comrades, probably they were - given that she was one of the newer people under the Normandy flag. As the two humans neared, it was impossible not to hear what they were talking about. _
> 
> _ “You mean the Matriarch’s child is here? The.. what was her name, Kaidan?” _
> 
> _ “Dr. Tsoni. Liara T’soni. She’s very pretty.” _
> 
> _ “All asari’s are pretty.” _
> 
> _ “This one is very pretty, Doc. You didn’t hear how every one of the crew started betting.” _
> 
> _ “Did you bet?” _
> 
> _ “Not this time. It looks like our Commander was struck by cupid.” _
> 
> _ “Really? No groping?” _
> 
> _ “It was a traumatic experience doc - still-” _
> 
> _ “Yes of course. Still. It’s Commander Shepard we’re talking about after all-- Oh. Hello Williams. Been waiting long?” _

_ Back to the present _

Ashley had a lot of reservations from that day going forward - and it never changed. Though she had started to view aliens in a better light, It was impossible to just believe that the hard-ass commander that had shouted at her from the first meet was actually - simply, an asari- addict. From there and then, as she left the med bay, she followed the crews eyes and listened to their words - got into betting with the others just for the fun of it - and at the end of it all, Chakwas was the one to win - and a very specific bet at that.

_ 'Shepard and Liara would sleep together before the end of our journey, but they won't be melding. I'm betting on that.'  _

From then on, she had learned more about the commander, mostly from whoever of the crew was willing to speak about it - mostly it was Joker.  It did impress her though - from the way Shepard melted and how Liara, innocent that she had been a few years earlier - threw caution into the wind and just jumped at first sight - it was romantic, almost poetic and -- and was Liara looking a little stuffed today?

The moment snapped Shepard back to reality, setting a blue bum down until Liara’s legs unwrapped from her. Her hands stayed splayed on the asari’s hips, and her eyes quickly snapped towards the reality of the moment.

“Liara - you-” Shepard remembered. Remembered the words that were spoken before they left each others arms. She had so much to ask the asari, so much concern that needed to be brought up - things she was afraid to know but knew she had suck up and learn about.

Liara moved her head shyly away from the Lieutenant Commander. It had been a while since she had seen Ashley in the flesh - and old reservations had remained, but the smile she received settled her nerves a little bit.  “Come Shepard.” Liara said, holding tightly on Shepard’s hand and pulling her towards the elevator that would lead them to their destination - Liara didn’t want to talk about her predicament- not yet - and especially not to other people around.

* * *

“Ash! Ashley! No!”

“Damn it! James take the robot - let's go!” Shepard had hurriedly carried Ashley on her shoulders as she ordered James to pick up the now obviously robotic body of one Eva Core. As they had the shuttle shoot up back to the Normandy, Shepard kept her head in her hands, not even noticing Liara comfort her as she pressed angry red welts from her armored hands to her head. 

This was not supposed to happen. She wasn’t supposed to have any members down like this - and for the record, she had told herself she was never going to lose another team mate- not after the Blitz. She had done everything that even when it was a choice between Ashley and Kaidan back in Virmire- something that was almost impossible, she was able to find a solution to.

She was Commander fucking Shepard, she was not going to let distance take away the life of her friends - much more due to some robotic AI.

“Shepard, my love, please.” Liara urged her, trying to soothe the now shivering Commander. Liara watched as Shepard eased on her hands and head, but the redhead still had her head in her hands and the uncontrollable shaking of Shepard's leg was such indication of how stressed her beloved was.

For all of Shepard’s easy going attitude, all of it were thrown down the window when it came to her being the Commander. Even Liara knew her presence wasn’t enough to comfort the redhead when it came to the issue of the people - alien or otherwise - under her command. It was why even all her fishes were fed - her hamster was taken care of - Shepard took care of everyone as much as she could - sacrifice herself if she could. This was no different.

Liara did what she could as well, she stayed beside Shepard - from the time they hurried Ashley towards the med bay until she had to physically ask Chakwas to sedate Shepard so that they could haul the commander back to the cabin.

“EDI, please do not disturb the Commander unless it’s important - and let me know if we’re nearing the Citadel.”

“Of course Liara.” EDI said back, no more needing the hologram as her voice was regulated automatically in the Normandy.

Looking at the fetal position her beloved was, Liara sighed and removed her clothes, tucking them both under the covers as she spooned the redhead from behind.

When she had lost Shepard once it was unbearable, and although she knew that Shepard had somehow found peace regarding the events of the Blitz, the death of her men had scarred her deeply that the thought of losing a team member now would be just as unbearable - maybe even moreso.

Liara tucked herself closer to the redhead’s back, taking care that her bulging stomach would not be too roughed up between them. When Shepard was better, they could talk. 

For now, her beloved needed to rest and she needed to steel her heart again for whatever answer may come.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes is it a good idea I'm doing Audentes and this at the same time? Somehow no because they're at the same point in time right now. AKA Mars.
> 
> But yeah, I was afraid that both Shepard's were going to be too similar. Imagine my surprise that they actually have big differences! (Apart from one being sexually active and one being more... conservative haha) Hope I can flesh them out more XD


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shepard comes back in the Normandy after a little request with Aria.

_ Year 2186, Early March _

“You broke Omega’s ONLY rule???” 

Shepard quickly flailed and placed her hands on plated mouth - “Shut up Garrus!” she said with alarm, looking left and right from entering the airlock of the Normandy. She had just been dropped off at the Citadel, and in record time as she only had a few hours before the scheduled launch back in space. At these moments, Liara usually busied herself with her father, or made sure to catch up on the quiet of the Normandy doing her broker duties.

The redhead scratched her head, tense in her tone as she moved past the turian and headed towards the elevators. “I don’t know why I tell you everything at the first opportunity. You have the worst shock response ever - and to think you can blast a man’s head in one shot without flinching.”

Beside her Garrus laughed, if he had such bad responses then Shepard made a poor choice to always have him learn things first. “You know I wouldn’t tell a single soul, Shepard.”

“You won’t - not deliberately, cause I’m sure the whole Normandy heard you already.” Shepard rolled her eyes. “I’m sure you’re just itching to tell Tali about this - give me a break, please and just tell her when you see her in person. I don’t want a dozen voice mails and emails asking for the juicy details.”

Garrus started to open his mouth but Shepard beat him to it. “And no, I’m not going to tell you the ‘raunchy’ details until Tali gets here. You won’t be able to hold it in. I know.” Shepard’s reaction turned smug as the elevator rose, despite the obvious apprehension on what would happen - most noticeably with Liara - that little session on Omega blew her mind.

_ “Clean up this mess.” _

_ Shepard barely took a look at the newest corpse in Omega, although she normally would have let Petrovsky live and find justice the proper way - she knew the rules in Omega were very different, and if she were in Aria’s bloody heels? Then by all means, she’d probably do the same.  _

_ Turning her head to side, Shepard gave the violet asari her attention as she was addressed. _

_ “Shepard.” Aria started, her voice unusually warm and dare Shepard think it, confused. “I never thought I’d enjoy having a partner.” _

_ Oh… so there was that. Looks like the Pirate Queen of Omega had a little bit of heart after all. Shepard would have grinned like a monkey and juggled oranges out of the praise but after spending time with Aria and having the asari rub off on her a little bit, she made sure to school her features to one of indifference. She was going to savor this mome-- _

_ Scalding hot eyes stared into her for one quick second before her arms were forcefully held into place - a strength she didn’t think Aria would be demonstrating - and fucking delicious thin and usually cruel lips enveloped her. As quickly as it came - Aria pushed her- and Shepard only had that split second to meet the asari’s eyes. _

_ Both women narrowed their eyes at each other, Aria out on a defense - misunderstanding the situation, and Shepard all out on glory. Fuck she had never thought she’d be at the top of the food chain getting the delicious most violent violet lips in the whole Terminus Spa- no in the whole of the galaxy. Fuck this if she wasn’t going to go and try. _

_ Just as she opened her mouth to speak, Aria turned away, folding her hands under her before quickly speaking another set of warmer words that Shepard never realized she’d hear. Aria’s narrowed eyes looked at her one more time before softening again, “Thank you for… not interfering, killing that man was… deeply satisfying.” _

_ The redhead was unable to keep a grin at that, and before Aria could speak again, Shepard struck a fluid pose, a pose she was used to using on every dancer in Omega - her hip was by the railing as one foot crossed behind the other - but this time, rather than lean forward as if in interest to leer at one of the dancers, Shepard straightened her back and leaned slightly backwards, folding her arms similarly to Aria - a pose projecting cockiness, power- the same kind of sexual power that Aria usually gave off. _

_ The little cock in her head was the cherry on top. “You’re welcome to thank me again if you want something else to be… deeply satisfying.” _

_ It was a rare treat to have already had Aria’s thanks, and be close to the asari in a few hours that Shepard had learned some of the pirate queen’s quirks. That included being quiet when ganged up on by some of her and Nyreen’s paragon suggestions. How Aria would quickly narrow her eyes and only move them to view someone - even if they were at the edge of her own peripheral vision just to make sure she didn’t miss any detail. How every movement was precise and calculated - the same kind of precision that Aria used to direct her men- a precision that matched her strength when throwing biotics. So now what a treat it was to not only see a softer side, but also have Aria look at her as if she was going to stutter- but then the shock in the ocean blue eyes turned into mirth, and Shepard had to bite her tongue not to falter in her pose as Aria couldn’t help it and released a chuckle. A chuckle that quickly turned into a snort.  _

_ Shepard rolled her eyes at Aria’s retreating back. _

_ Settling on the other edge of the landing, where Petrovsky’s last breath was taken, Aria rested one hand on the control board as one hand curled to signal Shepard to move towards her. _

_ Thinking about it for a second, Shepard realized that no matter what pose she gave, it was obvious Aria would never give anyone but herself the upper hand, so if she wanted to save face, she had to keep herself one notch down.  _

_ ‘But hey, if it takes me one notch down towards her azure then---’ _

_ Thoughts were quickly shoved when Aria pulled on her chest plate biotically, letting Shepard stumble slightly forwards. The redhead hoped Aria wouldn’t need to biotically have her kneel. That wouldn’t be fun at all. If the asari said it on the other hand-- _

_ “Kneel.” _

_ Oh… so they were going to do it then? _

_ Shepard followed, kneeling slowly as she made sure not to lose contact with the eyes that stared down at her. _

_ “So…” Aria started a drawl in her voice, as if treating Shepard nothing more than a disturbance, “you want to reach the top. Just like that?”  _

_ There felt like a vague sense of deja vu, and Shepard followed the first thing her mind said. “I think I deserve it.” _

_ “Oh do you now?” The tug on Aria’s lips made it obvious that Shepard made the right decision - and more importantly, Aria was enjoying it. _

_ Shepard smirked, a smirk that turned into a grin as her heart beat fast in her chest, she knew the words she had to take - goddess so help her that dream better had been training to make the scene a reality. “Scratch that… mistress.” Shepard licked her lips, angling herself to put both her hands behind her - a vulnerable position despite the fire in her eyes “I know I deserve it, and if I have to start from your toes - I will.”  _

_ There was no time to double guess either, as Aria’s lips curved into a giant - almost cruel - but unmistakably triumphant smirk, and although it looked cruel from anyone else who saw the display, the softness in the asari’s eyes - only directed at the kneeling human - made it obvious that this was the right way to go. _

_ WIth lithe movements that only dancers of a certain profession would have skill of, Aria raised herself more towards the control board, putting one high heeled shoe directly on Shepard’s left shoulder. Knowing the game has started- Shepard closed her eyes and moved her face sideways, rubbing her face on the tops of Aria’s - thankfully clean - ankles like a kitten- making it a point to moan and make a show out of it. When she deemed it enough she inched to move her hands away from her back, and since no command to stop was given, Shepard went ahead to use her now free hands to take off the shoe - just as she started, the weight on her shoulder was gone and before Shepard could whine, cool asari fingers wrapped around her own lightly gloved hands and she was pulled up - quickly, almost forcibly. _

_ Aria pressed a button on the console - and Shepard could hear the doors of Afterlife closing - and despite the whispers of clamor and confusion - one that Aria did not share - the redhead followed the asari into one of the private rooms - an office that was thankfully decorated fresh and didn’t endure any broken glass or gunshots during the little battle earlier. _

_ Admiring the view of the room, Shepard spoke. “Didn’t think you’d be -oomph!” _

_ Once again a - very welcome assault was made on her person as the violet lips captured hers, Shepard gave in, giving as good as she got - before Aria moved away - a tease on her lips as she cocked her head ever so lightly as if in challenge. With a nod - more to herself really- Shepard eased most of her armor down, removing the clasps from her arms and chest, leaving her in her leg armors and a tank top, the cool air quickly enveloped her, leaving little goosebumps that she noticed Aria took notice of. _

_ Storing away that little tidbit, Shepard proceeded to look small as she neared the asari again, making sure to keep her head down as she removed the executioner's pistol from Aria’s side - a move that Aria welcomed.  _

_ “Is this how you play Shepard?” Aria drawled again, and Shepard made sure not to look, the voice that her partner commanded seemed to be one of play - and she knew she had to play her part as well. “You said I was to meet something… deeply satisfying. This surely can’t be it?” _

_ Shepard couldn’t help but quirk her lips, thankful her head was down as even though it was technically a jab at her expense, it was obvious that Aria was curious - excited even. Keeping quiet and satisfied that there was nothing on Aria or her person to poke an eye out, Shepard knelt again, placing her hands on her thighs as she snuggled her face on the asari’s leather clothed thighs. Slowly, Shepard made sure not to burn her face too much, just giving enough pressure for Aria to feel as she rubbed herself and sighed out of pleasure.  _

_ It had been a long while since she had last had satisfying rough sex - although the sex part was given by Liara - freely and without preamble, especially after six months of not getting any, she couldn’t do anything remotely rough to a second term pregnant asari. Doing this now, smothering her face on leather and moving up to the small areas where Aria’s corset belts met - kissing the little patches of skin she could see - she knew that there was going to be such a reward if she played her cards right. _

_ From above, Aria watched the human willingly cater to her, and although Aria preferred to be more demanding in bed, she wanted to make sure that her first time - with anyone really - not that most people got a second time - was precise and calculated. She needed to know if whoever was going to get in her personal space would be worth the time and effort. This time though, she already knew that Shepard was worth it; Hero of the Citadel - and technically Hero of Terminus Space due to the end of the Collectors - know savior of the galaxy, and also ‘Co-Liberator of Omega’ probably, she needed to know if the commander actually had what it took. _

_ So far it surprised her how submissive the woman was - Aria knew that Shepard could be a goody two shoes. Hell that was why she went in toting with a justicar no less - a justicar who willingly turned blind eye to the obvious shit hole that was Omega to be able to help the spectre. It also surprised her because her girls never whispered - or gave notice that Shepard could be anything other than a powerhouse. _

_ Seeing this - well, it was all turning out better in her favor. _

_ She could feel the human lips on her skin, she could feel the enveloping of the lips sucking, the licking by the tongue, twirling - making spiral patterns that jumped around her corset belts and tried to dip along the edges of her pants. She watched as Shepard’s closed eyes conveyed trust and passion, as if in the act of total reverence. It actually made her a lot more interested - what was Shepard showing her now, and what could Shepard be if she were one of her other dancers? _

_ Shepard turned to the other side of her waist, and Aria made a humming noise of affirmation. “That’s good, you’re a pretty good little spectre aren’t you?” she asked, thrumming her fingers around red hair, fisting it lightly and making Shepard move to look at her.  _

_ “I’m a pretty good little spectre mistress.” Shepard whispered, her tongue darting out again - hungry to taste skin.  _

_ Watching Shepard had turned her on more than she cared to admit, to have one of the most powerful women in the galaxy -- to know that Shepard had this nice little kink. _

_ Aria let Shepard continue on for a few more minutes, enjoying how the supple human tongue lapped through whatever skin it could, how the face rubbed against her, but a bigger part of her grew more curious. If she were only to let herself indulge with Shepard once - just this one time - what route would she choose? _

_ “Stand up Shepard.” _

_ Shepard stopped immediately, the voice above having taken on an edge of unfamiliar command. _

_ “No -” Aria said, stopping the spectre from talking. “I enjoyed the sight of you on your knees- but I’ll have to be honest, my girls have never said anything about you being so… submissive-” _

_ Shepard moved to speak before another sharp look stopped her. Seems like Aria had a little speech in her head. _

_ “Not that I mind. I think I’ll be enjoying you like that after all. But I am curious - especially after you oh so let me have my way and yet be … quite- ruthless throughout our little Omega romp, What secrets do you hide?” _

_ Shepard nodded to herself. “Well, I guess we can find out. If you really want it, just tell me.” _

_ “I wouldn’t have wondered if I didn’t.” Aria said back, not giving Shepard the win to actually say she wanted this outright. _

_ Taking that as invitation enough, Shepard clicked a keypad lock on her hip and effectively her leg armor disengaged and dropped with a heavy thud on the floor, and with hands quicker than what Aria had noticed, the two hands on either side of her corset belts flipped the locks of her belt and two strong and warm human hands wrapped on her waist, holding her tightly - just as fast as it was, warm hips were poised directly in front of hers and Shepard had her hot breath on her neck. _

_ “I’m not an asari doll Shepard, you could be rougher, unless this is your limit?” Aria smirked. _

_ Her smirk was equally met with Shepard’s own, and for a small moment, Aria had to blink at how… appealing the commander suddenly looked, her red hair falling in front, shimmering dark green eyes glittering from behind them - and that oh so delicious looking smirk - ready in place.  _

_ Whatever praise that was in her head vanished when Shepard’s let out a familiar biotic ripple- and not only was her leather pants out of commission, but Shepard’s last traces of clothing rippled and flitted down.  _

_ “You’ll have to pay for that.” Aria frowned, even though she would have technically not needed it. _

_ The commander smirked at her, tongue wetting her lips before diving straight to bite a pulse point - “Make me.” _

“Normandy to Shepard. Normandy to Shepard. Coming in --” 

Shepard blinked at the voice behind her - how could Joker be talking to her if she was --- 

“Good to see you back Commander.” Joker’s voice continued. 

From the cockpit, Joker’s smile was huge, Edi had told him that there were numerous complaints that the elevator wasn’t going down. Once the complaint jumped to three people, she had opened a feed of the elevator camera’s that showed Shepard just at the doorway of the elevator- and although not fully seen, the backs of Garrus’ head was there. "It seems Shepard is in a daze." The AI told Joker, showing him the feed.  


Shepard answered “Joker hey. What’s up?”

“You have been holding the elevator for a few minutes Shepard. There have been complaints.” Edi answered as Joker had started to build up a laugh.

Blinking and looking at the camera’s overhead, Shepard jumped from the door and slapped the now laughing turian in front of her. “Seriously you didn’t even pull me out of my daydreaming?”

“Ha-- how could I?” Garrus said in between gasps of childish laughter “You weren’t even listening to me - now you really gotta tell me what happened. That day dream looked really deep.”

Shepard went straight to her room - stopping just at the threshold to face the turian once again.

“Just for that - you’re buying the next round of drinks.” 

As Garrus started to sputter out excuses - the cabin door closed behind her - locking the turian out for good measure.

* * *

Back in Omega, every able hand was busy rebuilding. Aria had in no simple way told them that they could have all died - but due to her divine intervention, the residents were saved from suffocation and were now - essentially liberated, all thanks to her - and a 'notable' sidekick.

Grizz entered the room where she was in - the room she and Shepard had been in only a few hours later, and although she had a certain - headache she only heard of but never experienced before, Aria couldn’t help but internally worry. 

“What do you need Aria?” Grizz said, watching his boss in deep thought - not even looking at him in her usual demeaning demeanor when ordering him.

“When this gets all settled, I’m going back to the Citadel to conveniently tie up loose ends. Make sure a working ship get's me there - and... get me a reservation next Thursday for the Consort, 7pm sharp.”

Grizz watched as Aria still had yet to address him properly - it almost concerned him really - the last time he had seen Aria like this was when --- well, that was a thought better thought of _**not**_ within the vicinity of his boss. 

“Of course.” He said it but he knew it was going to be a hell of a lot of threatening - and maybe even some maiming to happen just to slash off whoever was in line for Shaira’s 7pm Thursday client. Stronger people have done more sinister things just to meet up with the famous Shaira - him included.

“Also,” Grizz stopped to turn around as Aria addressed him again, this time, icy blue eyes stared at him in the usual manner. “I hope you got the coordinates Shepard and I sent regarding my sofa. I want it dry cleaned and back here by noon tomorrow.”

Aria watched the door close behind Grizz, there was much work to be done - and overthinking her current situation was not going to help her- or her image of getting Omega back in shape. With a low growl of frustration, it looks like her patience needed to be stretched until she could meet the asari consort.

_ “You aren’t going to get pregnant are you?” pale pink lips asked, not even an inch away from her own as green eyes stared - almost worriedly at her. _

_ She couldn’t help but give out a harsh scoff, it would have been worse and she could have blasted the spectre’s ass out of the bed but the way the green eyes looked at her -as if truly worried made her stop. ‘Damn kindness.’ She thought of herself, realizing that some of Nyreen- and Shepard’s earlier goody two shoes business started rubbing off on her. _

_ “I’m not like your little asari maiden, Shepard. You don’t have to get worried -” Aria huffed pining the soldier back down for the fourth round of fucking, her eyes have yet to slaken off the meld and Shepard’s stamina and flexibility on being a bottom and top were refreshing to have. ‘Plus’ she added as a thought to herself ‘there’s a 97.8 percent chance that matriarch’s aren’t going to get pregnant anymore’ Not that anyone really thought of her as being almost one thousand years old, but the benefits of asari's looks had always been a form of blessing. _

“If I’m going to be one of those lucky 2.2 percent I'm going to fucking destroy something.” Aria growled out loud, standing up from the desk to finally cater to the thirty four requests the civilians had for her.

Who says The Pirate Queen of Omega only let her people do the dirty work after all?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dear lordy I'm back. I actually wrote a full sex scene - but it just didn't fit. So I guess writing sex scenes is still going to be in my forever bucket lists of "I hope to do one day" and make this work without a full sex scene. But hey flashback / one shots is a thing so if I find a way to make it work, I'll add it in XD
> 
> I realized that I put a lot of pressure on myself in making a good sex scene (still) and it's one of the things that stopped me from my regular updates. Like how I do Audentes, I hope to make this into a slowish burn so I can give the emotional quality I wanted to write - and just write the shmexy scenes when it really feels like it's ready to be written.
> 
> Thanks for reading :)


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A chapter dedicated to a bit of background with another wife.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This got long! Did not expect it XD

**_Present time: Year 2186, June_ **

"Well, well, look what we have here." A familiar voice called to her in the dark, there was barely any light save for a soft shimmering glow from afar, but in this little room- tucked quietly in a private strip in Illium, Shepard felt almost at home. 

The human snorted at her thought, earning a raised brow that she knew would decorate the face of the woman in front of her. She wouldn't see it - not in this darkness, but for years she had known this body - even as they were always in the dark - there was no safer space. At least unless she were with a certain justicar or another little scientist.

The voice with her thrummed low, and Shepard could feel her skin prickle at the talented fingers that knew how to make her submit. "I hope that snort isn't for me, my darling?" 

"It's not," Shepard replied, easily finding another expanse of skin her hand could settle on as she pulled the body closer. "Actually it is for you - not like we can _'look_ ' with how dark it always is- right?" She received a fond chuckle as fingers tapped around her collarbone. "I'm just surprised being like this - with you - feels peaceful. Silly isn't it? I don't even know you and yet---" her words were cut short when hot breath replaced the finger on her collarbone, and little nips of soft lips pressed onto her skin, trailing up to her sensitive ears.

Shepard moaned.

The woman in front of her hummed, as if in thought as she proceeded to bathe the human in kisses - reveling in the strong calloused hands that rubbed along her body, finding the spots that have been neglected for so long. "It does feel like home doesn't it? But you don't have to know me. We have this." she pressed her body closer, and she chuckled as the human let out a mewl and her hands stopped wandering through strong biceps. 

"Hush. Humans can be so impatient." she chided as she moved her hands away, a soft cloth rustled in between them before dropping, and Shepard had to hiss as she felt perfectly pebbled tips upon her chest as the woman pushed towards her.

"And you asari take too much time." Shepard growled, hefting the asari up- feeling delicious legs instantly wrap around her as they both dropped to the bed.

* * *

** _Sometime during second quarter 2178 - the night after the Skylian Blitz Second Anniversary Win_**

She had lost a dare with a group of aliens one night when her and her men were out drinking in Illium. It was from pure drunken revelry and youth that she realized late she had done one of the worst things that could have happened in Illium - she signed a contract.

When morning came, she looked at the contract again, it didn't seem so sinister, apart from the fact that she now had to take a place of a different human to meet someone for a "quiet evening trip". It was a good thing that she was on downtime for another day, there were worse things that doing brig time, and it was the tiny little clause at the end of the page that suggested if she should balk, she would pay not just a hefty fine, but also be unable to visit Illium for at least ten years.

That wouldn't be very fun.

Shepard jumped when the seat beside her sunk, "By gee, by golly. You've really done it this time, J." Kirk said.

Kirk was a handsome fellow, dirty blonde hair and cheeks that could cut diamonds, it would have been nice to have someone so attractive beside her if her friend didn't still smelled of booze and mistakes - and so with his face nauseatingly near hers as he read through the papers in her hand - Shepard had to grit her teeth at the obvious joke he was known to pull at her expense.

3...2... --- A bubble of laughter escaped him "Maybe you should give Mystery dude...tte a little 'sorry' note and trade your freedom for your Star of Terra? Oh wait. You can't cause they don't care about that in Illium!" 

Kirk was a good friend, a good friend who knew how to pull an ass out of real trouble, at least when they were on the clock, but during instances like this, he was as useless as a starving biotic - it took all of her willpower not to strangle him just so he'd shut up. She was already having a horrid hangover, and the paper in front of her looked dreadful for each passing minute. 

"Thanks K." she said with a roll of her eyes. "You know anyone on Illium we could maybe trade this document with?" she asked. She should have never celebrated her teams 'Anniversary' win of the Blitz. After this, she was never going to celebrate another win for the rest of her life, even if it meant she had saved the galaxy. Nothing was worth being tied down into such unknown.

"Un-for-tu-na-te-ly.... no, there's nothing we can do, you see this nice little sign here?" he said, his pointing finger at the scribbled - but legible 'J.Shepard' on the bottom of the document - "You signed it, and as we know on Illium, everything is tracked and traced, so even if let's say you toss this document to the fire, you'll still get fucked."

There it was. She knew a joke would come again.

"Hmm. wait - they said 'a quiet little evening trip' oh golly. Guess you'll be fucked either way. Good luck Jane!" with a slap on her back and another huff of laughter, Kirk stood up and left her alone on the sofa.   
  
"Whatever happens..." Shepard told herself- head in hands as the document started to crumple. "As long as it's not a hanar... or a volus... or a vorcha, or wait I'll take the volus - not the batarian... oh god, just please let this be an asari."

Night time came in Illium - and despite her initial trepidation, the meeting place wasn't so bad. The neighborhood was loud, but sleek - definitely high end - not someplace she'd usually go to. So whatever this was, was probably a date. Maybe she should have dressed up? The contract did say they were looking for a female human - for a quiet little evening trip. Her brown leather jacket and corduroy jeans didn't exactly scream 'date-worthy'. 

Her trail of thoughts dissipated when beside her someone cleared their throat, looking beside her Shepard had to clear her own throat out of excitement.

It was an asari! Her date was an asari!

"H.. hi! You must be my date contract?" Shepard greeted, her smile and eyes wide with genuine giddiness. She held out a hand for the other to take. Maybe they could swap names - if that was allowed.

Her hand was not met, but the coquettish look given by the asari in front of her made Shepard let the instant slide. She was beautiful, a deep blue tone like the deepest part of the oceans - or maybe it was jut the neon lights - but the unmistakable swirls on her face, almost like inverted butterfly wings - the pattern was captivating. It was unfair how an unknown being could build such beautiful creations.

Shepard gulped, her staring evident. "You're beautiful." 

A laugh bubbled from the chest of the newcomer, but at the shake of a blue head, Shepard found herself a little bit more alert.

"I'm not the one you're meeting. But I am here to take you there."

"How did you know it was going to be me?" A puzzled look passed through her - so this asari in front of her was part of the contract -it was a sort business then? Of course it was, everything was business in Illium.

"Simple." the asari smiled, the tips of the butterfly wings gracing the tips of the upturned lips, "Because you look like you've never been here before." 

Shepard was dunk in complete darkness - all her military training kicked in and she would have hit someone out of self defense - it was fortunate that the asari escort she had started to talk before flight or fight response came out.

"Relax. You're safe, this is supposed to be a pleasant night after all."

There was something a little unnerving about it - but the lips so close to her ear made her melt a little bit more. If there was something - or someone Shepard was weak with - it were the Asari, the first time she had met one her jaw was floored and her knees went wobbly - of course the very first asari she met also tried to kill her - but there was no doubt that she was beautiful. When she had passed the first time in the Citadel, she thoroughly debated if she could try for C-Sec just to be nearer more of the blue beauties that easily made up most of the Citadel residents.

A little more step forward and the only visage of light was from the smoky window on the corner of the room - Shepard could feel a bed where she stopped walking, but apart from that - nothing else immediately came to the senses. She knew the asari was still with her, but with the lack of light, it was impossible to distinguish any obvious features apart from the deep crests where their tentacle like hair folded.

The door opened wider, and the woman's silhouette slowly merged with the outside. "Enjoy the night, remember - no lights." The door behind her closed, and Shepard could feel a weight in her throat. The same trepidation came back - so it wasn't a date - it was really going to really be an "evening trip". On how good it was - well, it was something that she hoped would be good for her too. Another wave of trepidation kicked in upon realizing that her dreams of her partner being an asari could have technically been anyone else now---

Shepard wasn't able to think farther than that when the door once again opened. 

A small "finally" was muttered by the newcomer, the door was shut closed and Shepard could only see the silhouette of the same deep crests on the head before a small orange light came from where an ear would be - two blinks and then it was gone. Before Shepard could speak, clothes were being rustled off and with an act that was uncommon in escorts and one night stands, she quickly tried to grab an arm - 

"Huh?" the voice said.

Shepard couldn't exactly see it, but the feel of clothes being bunched where her hand met scaled arm proved her ears right, her companion was already removing her clothes. 

"No - no put the translator back on." she said - hoping that maybe at least the word translator was easy enough to be understood. Given that the newcomer just closed their receiver - anything Shepard would say could be dust thrown in the wind, and though she knew that sex needed little words to be understood, having a ready to charge asari was something she didn't expect.

The arm she held stilled, and there seemed to be a coldness that suddenly thrummed in the room, as if she made a mistake. With graceful movement the arm she held moved itself down, and Shepard had no choice but gently remove her hand. She didn't see the orange glow that said the translator was back on- but perfect English moved towards her ears.

"I don't need it - but I'd prefer if yours were off. I hope you aren't new at this." Prim voice assaulted her, the accent was Armali- and Shepard's knees almost buckled - _"definitely Asari"_ , there was a certain strength under it that made her want to submit - but at the same time, there was a certain edge that in the right circumstance would be just mind blowing if she could have this prim and proper asari kneel for her.

"I..." Shepard had to debate whether she should tell her companion about the contract switch.

She wasn't able to think long when a precise - albeit impatient- "Yes?" was thrown her way. Again it sent a chill down her spine.

"Yeah. I'm new at this." Shepard admitted, realizing that given the contract and secrecy there was something to be said about this 'evening trip' - it was for the pros. "I..."

"I see." she was cut short again from explaining. "This is the first time I have ever experienced such... buffoonery in this company. If you can't fulfill the services tasked with you - then I'm afraid-"

If there was one thing Shepard didn't like, it was others assuming because she wasn't given reprieve of finishing. It gave her a lot of brig time for insubordination with the Alliance, and a lot of trouble with those of higher position. But she was a being too - and even though she didn't know what the contract did entail during these little 'evenings' she still was allowed a mouth and so she used it. 

"Hey. I'm talking here." Shepard said, her tone clipped and with a small lilt of frustration. The same kind of tone a Lt. Commander would use when they had their own little insubordinate subordinates. 

If affronted had a shadow face - it would be this persons face right now. "How dare--" they weren't able to finish anything when Shepard stepped up and went toe to toe with the other. A wrong deep breath made her smell the faintest but obvious scent of 'lavender and citrus' and it clouded her head for a moment before she was able to speak. The proximity of both of them together didn't help too, but the asari in front of her did proceed to listen as she was quiet and only their breaths spoke to each other.

Shepard decided this was the best time to start talking. "I lost a dare, signed a contract - yeah I know stupid - and since I don't want to pay a fine or stop visiting Illium for the next ten years, I'm pushing this through. You seem to have done this a lot of times, no judgement - tell me what I need to do and I'll do it."

Another quiet instance filled the room and another rustle of clothes moved - in an instant, Shepard could feel a heavy bunch of clothes pool on her feet.

"Crude. But effective. Please turn off your translator." was the last thing the asari said before Shepard felt the softest lips God ever made capture her own.

* * *

** _Citadel- sometime during fourth quarter- 2178_ **

"Late night?"

Tevos barely raised her head at the voice by the door. She knew Sparatus meant well, but usually when he would ask - whatever her answer may be, it would be him coming to her room and proceeding to talk for hours on end. Normally it would be a welcome distraction, but not now. Now there were a dozen calls for uproar, and even though most of them could have easily been blocked - a select few that could no doubt tip the delicate balance of galactic peace had to be addressed.

"Unfortunately." she kept her tone clipped, there was no reason to say much, Sparatus would do enough of it for both of them, better to save her energy as well. 

The turian invited himself inside, and like clockwork, proceeded to uncork a dextro wine - usually used by Tevos as gifts - drank a shot and then readied another for later - he then walked towards the big windows, idly watching. In a few seconds he would speak - if he started on a positive note, it would probably take two hours of talking and they were done, if it was a negative note --- thank the goddess she had a lot of work in front of her to keep her occupied.

"Animals. All of them, aren't they?" Sparatus said in perfect timing as he swirled the drink in his glass. 

Just as Tevos was to speak - her private terminal beeped, a familiar tone that was made for secure channels only. With a practiced - tired sigh, she moved towards the terminal and schooled her features to make sure Sparatus knew she was busy for work reasons. Biting her tongue to keep the excitement in check, she opened the message.

> _To: L._
> 
> _Wonderful day, Platinum Member!_
> 
> _We are pleased to tell you that your Platinum Membership request has been granted!_   
>    
>  _Details of your meeting will be as follows:_   
>  _Date: Any date/time after three days time - with at least two days notice_   
>  _Duration: 1 Night_   
>  _Cost: Free (From Fifteen Year Anniversary Bonus)_   
>  _Planet: Illium, Stateside Towers_   
>    
>  _Thank you for your patronage,_   
>  _eXquisite meets  
>  "we satisfy your urges"_

"Tevos? Are you alright?" Tevos had to quickly shut down the terminal without thought at the realization that Sparatus- curse the snooper that he was - was almost beside her - ready to see what she was looking at. Sometimes the man had no boundaries when it was - what he called 'past office hours'.

Taking a deep breath, Tevos turned to address him, her hands holding each other as it laid perfectly on top of her lap, "Yes, why do you ask?" 

"It just looked like you were going to burst there for a second. The message looked really important - should I cancel my dinner with the primarch next week?" the turian asked, a slight concern on his face before backing away and sitting on a nearby sofa.

"No, no, it's just..." she had to think fast, she wanted to take the chance for her request at the fastest date possible, which was in four days - that would give her enough time to take a short leave before Sparatus had his dinner. "Actually, yes. It is quite important, do you remember Matriarch Mallol and Dorothea? They finally have news for a new shipment to be traded in one of your outposts for the cabals, unfortunately, there are... complications with the usual. It will not hinder your schedule with the primarch, but I will be out, the day after tomorrow for three days to foresee the meeting with them. Would you and Valern be alright while I am gone?"

Sparatus did another of his annoying habits of tilting his head as if in playful consideration. Tevos sighed inwardly, why did she always have to practice her diplomacy wherever she went, whether it was dealing with actual council matters or the council members themselves. After a solid minute and a half passed, with scattered thrums of 'hmmm' echoing in the room, Sparatus finally nodded his head. "I'll let Valern know. Do you want me to set you a trip?"

Tevos smiled, a rare occurrence even to the others. "No thank you, they will be arranging it for me. Why don't you go and have another glass? I think I'll be setting myself late tonight as I shall leave early tomorrow." the asari councilor turned back to her work, Sparatus would start talking once again after he had another shot. 

Or lucky her, it turned out the Turian Councilor just emptied out her special dextro wine.

* * *

** _Terra Nova, Asgard System, Exodus Cluster- two days before Sparatus drank the whole bottle in Tevos' office_ **

A heroes welcome. 

Twenty three families were around the small garden in Terra Nova. Bloodshot green eyes followed the march of twenty three sets of flags walk down the aisle, sixteen of the flags were on top of caskets, the others were held, a posthumous medal etched with the names of the fallen on top of each flag as it was laid to rest.

Seven families had no bodies to see, only memories. Kirk's family was one of them.

When the ceremony ended and families approached their departed loved ones for a quiet moment of peace, a woman with dirty blonde hair appeared beside her, together with a younger woman, maybe no older than her - with strikingly beautiful cheekbones... and also dirty blonde hair. 

"You must be Shepard." the younger one spoke.

Shepard had to battle the bile that rose up her throat. "Yes Mam. I am."

"You don't have to call me Mam." the young one said kindly before throwing herself to the redhead in a hug. For a moment the world stilled, but when she could hear the choking noises only someone trying not to cry could make, Shepard let her own tears fall. Another set of arms enveloped her, and she realized that Kirk's sister and mother were there - they had no casket to embrace, no body to mourn - just a blank heavy medal - a weight that was nothing compared to the empty heaviness of losing a family member.

The arms around her softened and three pairs of glassy eyes stared at each other. "He always mentioned you in his letters Lt. Commander Shepard." the older woman said, "he enjoyed serving with you - even if - in his words - you beat him at almost everything."

Shepard couldn't help but chuckle, that was Kirk alright, and it just drilled a deeper hole to realize that one of her longest friends was gone.

Gone due to the Butcher of Torfan.

One and a half hours later - when she had bid her farewell to Kirk's family and paid her last respects, Shepard visited other family members whose departed she knew of, she only had two others to visit when a familiar blue caught her eye. The redhead decided against following - but another half hour after and finally visiting the last house - the asari she saw earlier was still there- watching her.

With a curious look, Shepard followed, the asari didn't move, but as she got closer- she could see the familiar butterfly swirls that patterned over beautiful deep blue skin.

"You..." Shepard breathed.

A smile was her answer.

"Yes. Me. Are you free for dinner?"

Shepard blinked, she had questions, questions on why this asari was here- and why now, all were removed when the asari continued to speak.

"I'm not asking you out on a date, Lt. Commander. But I do have a little concern. You can choose where, if you prefer to be safe." The smile the asari gave her should have been alarming, and yet it was the exact opposite, and so against her better judgement, Shepard went ahead for dinner. She did have questions after all.

"How did you find me?" Shepard asked as food were placed in front of them in a little hut cafe build in the settlement.

"It's my job to find you - to put it simply, someone requested you specifically."

A piece of meatball fell from the fork at the realization that this looking like a similar arrangement from the one she had on Illium not even a whole year past. "You're hiring me for an escort service again?"

"Technically, I didn't hire you the first time - you indebted yourself to it by signing a contract. This one though is - technically bound by a contract, but since you are... a special case - on a special request made seven months in the making, this very same member is looking forward to be given a repeat performance." 

"The same member?"

"Yes. The same one you had a 'quiet evening trip' with. Let us just say she is... a very prestigious member we would like to continue being... pleased. After your little mishap with the contract... well you are the only person, alien or otherwise she has requested again - plus, all other beings she has had a quiet evening trip with has been met with sub-par reviews. We would like to keep our members happy after all."

Shepard chewed on her food thoughtfully, memories of that night after the first anniversary of the Blitz echoing in her mind and giving her a wistful smile. It was one of the most magnificent nights of her life - and contract or no contract, she would welcome the asari back into her arms. But there were a lot of concerns too - concerns that hopefully this asari in front of her could address.

"What's your name?" Shepard blurted out, realizing that she had yet to know.

"You can call me Yavanna, Lt. Commander Shepard." the asari moved and placed a hand in front of her, the same way she had given Yavanna the first time they met, this time Shepard met the hand with her own, shaking it.

"Alright then, Yavanna. I'm listening- though I have questions."

"I shall answer them as I can, as long as it is in line with my contract."

* * *

_**Illium, three days after Sparatus drank the whole bottle in Tevos' office**  
_

> _There are no names. She does not know you, and you do not know her. It is a simple meeting for desires - and even peace. An evening of forgetting you both are to just... enjoy.  
>   
> _

Tevos was glad she had a lot of strings ready to pull. Matriarch Mallol would no doubt vouch for her, Dorothea was busy and wouldn't need to be contacted - but she had sent a message as well just in case the rare moment comes and Valern or Sparatus would request for her. No need for the other two council men to start a search party or worse - find out what her little monthly dalliances was all about. Truth be told, she would have probably stopped after a few more months of waiting. She knew that her requested human was not part of _eXquisite meets_ lineup, but her two centuries of patronage would have at least given her some leverage. Lo and behold, months after - her request was finally given, though the payment was the same - she might need to talk with this human and find out if she was being paid - or if this request was really swept under the rug so to speak. 

Shepard was waiting outside Stateside Towers, minding her own business and making sure she wasn't looking at the entrance lest she notice any familiar asari walking around- the meeting was simple, keep her head down until she got into the room - no looking at anyone else for the sake of secrecy. In fact, according to Yavanna the amount of credits that was being thrown for this 'freebie request' would have amounted the full price - and then some more of her supposed fine had she not pushed through the first contract. Of course, she didn't really do this for the money, not that there wasn't any need - but she really wasn't part of the business. Whoever she was meeting was technically a 'friend' so to speak, the money that would be 'commissioned' for her would go to a charity of her choice- that was enough. 

Why was she there anywhere? Ready for a fucking with a body she barely knew? She didn't want to think of herself as an escort - apart from that one contract; her dalliances with whoever she pleased didn't involve exchanging credits, but here she was - sitting in the lobby of a posh hotel, waiting to be called up. She closed her eyes and then looked up, opening it and seeing the bright lights that decorated the ceiling of the lobby, it's hue would have brought some kind of elegant decadence to ones eyes, but to Shepard - it brought misery.

Flash bangs and heavy grenades were used in the underground bunkers of Torfan, the air was think and smoky, blinding flashes and gunshots and shouts were heard all around, they only needed to push forward, protect their left and their right - their six was safe, as it was they who had charged and killed every batarian and criminal they could find upon landing. A total of two hundred and sixty dead from the Alliance, maybe six times more for the batarians. Thirty of those casualties came from her troops, one of those was Kirk. 

With a sigh, Shepard looked back down and stared at her hands, they were stained, as much as stained as any other troops that were ordered to kill the surrendered batarians without mercy. She didn't need to pull the trigger- but as the next highest commanding officer in that bunker, she might have said the order just as well.

"Maybe that's why I'm here now." Shepard mused to herself. Although she knew little of her past dalliances and one night stands, they know of each other and could know of each other. In the darkness and privacy Yavanna set up for her with this 'Lea', she could shed who she was. She didn't have to be anyone. Lea wouldn't know of her scars, and she wouldn't know of Lea's. It was just the two of them, in that moment, releasing tension, pain wouldn't be said - it would just seep away in tender asari arms and...

The private channel of her omnitool beeped, and Shepard got ready to head up to the room that was booked for them. Similar as before, the hallway was dark, lit only by soft floor lights that would barely make one register another's face, it would have been a little spooky if not for the relaxing ambiance. Once in front of the door, Shepard proceeded to knock twice, slowly opening the door and the familiar smoky yellow hue of the outside became the only light. Once the door was closed behind her- she was once again bathed in a familiar darkness -and enveloped by a familiar scent.

Within that similar second, she felt like there was something amiss in the room - she knew her 'partner' was there, but there was no familiar rustle of clothes being thrown down. 

"Hello there." came the voice, prim and proper as always, though maybe a little more timid than usual?

Shepard grinned despite herself, already feeling the familiar effects of happiness flood her senses. Her body and mind vividly remembered what had transpired months ago. "It's me again." she said simply, making a mock show of opening her arms.

She could hear foot falls coming towards her, and familiar touches of asari fingers trailed along her clothes chest, one hand inching towards her translator receiver to close it while both continued to trail - until it rested on encircling on her neck. She could feel the cartilage of the head below her chin and Shepard was surprised at the intimacy. The asari continued to speak, the Armali accent on English heavy "Yes it is you again. I am actually lost for words right now... I've... I've never done this before. Ask for a repeat of someone- not especially one who I know doesn't work for this arrangement."

Tevos kept herself quiet as she embraced the human in front of her, she didn't know who it was - as was the agreement, but during their first moment together despite the ravaged love making they had, there was a certain... attraction to how the human bathed her body in not just admiration - but in obvious care. Each movement was done in enthusiasm, and she could feel the pleasure radiating from the human, as if the act of being with her was done with utmost prestige. It was more than what her money could buy, a caring touch, strong and calloused despite the elegance of how it caressed her, the words that were spoken, as if it was only for her ears, something that she would have scoffed a trained escort would say - but not to this one, not to someone who was obviously there because she just happened to pass by. 

This time, the attraction was the same, the human felt strong under her fingers, muscles and sinews she could feel from her fingertips, muscles that rippled under the clothes she wore- abs that she licked hungrily and was given encouragement and actual sounds of pleasure from, and when the moment ended between them on their first night, there was no cold professionalism, no awkward moments. The human was awake before she was- and when Tevos did stir, the human loosened her hold and whispered to her- so passionate, so concerned. 

"Should I let go?" and for the first time - Tevos _almost_ said "No."

When she did ask to be let go, the human did so - but the small crush in embrace before the loosening hold actually bought a rush in emotions in her - unfamiliar - but oh did she crave it again. As she stood up, she noticed that the body on the bed had also moved, and the human took the clothes strewn by her and brought it to her. It was a little bit above and beyond the usual interaction - it was very obvious that the human didn't know she was supposed to be paid, and yet - here she was, doing more than the usual escort would.

Back at the present, Tevos didn't think that she would let herself have this 'sweet' moment. She had been waiting for this... special moment for a while now, and she had wanted nothing but to be ravaged and fucked - hard. Most especially she she knew she had a lot of work once she went back to the Citadel. The attack on Torfan was out of the usual council work- but since humanity and batarians had always had a rough history - no matter how short it was, a lot of workload piled up for the council - her more than usual as it was on her forte for diplomacy. But now, when the door opened and someone just... normal and free and open stood there - accepting, not knowing who she was or her troubles - and her not knowing if this human in front of her had any of their own- it was just so... so freeing. 

From there Tevos knew she would savor this moment.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've always thought what to do with Tevos- it's established that her kids are technically Shepard's 3rd oldest- but how, how do I slap it in that will give Tevos and Shepard a good "together" moment without having to be a "surprise" or "mistake" pregnancy. 
> 
> Well, let's just say that busy people need to let off steam too.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Direct continuation from the previous chapter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Goddess, I had to do a part 2.
> 
> and I had to post them together but didn't want to do a big 10k on one chapter XD

**_llium - Christmas- 2180_ **

"Merry christmas Lea." her human said. Tevos knew not when "J" became 'her human' in her mind, but one day it just did. 

Two months after their second meeting, Tevos had once requested again for J, and from there - they had not just consummated another round or ten of lovemaking, but they had started talking, and although they had only tackled 'fake' names and a bit more sweet nothings in each other's ears - their next meeting, the fourth- happened within less than two weeks from the last. Again it continued - whenever they could they met- she shed who she was, J did so as well. They were just two beings, reveling in the moment.  
  
The asari councilor found out that J didn't take any commissions from Yavanna's cut - although not under contract from eXquisite meets, J made a contract with the agent where she would give a big portion of her own money back to Yavanna, and whatever else was for donation - the only cut J took for herself was for her food and travel to Illium when they would meet. Their fifth meeting was not anymore under eXquisite meets but a regular occurrence that Yavanna herself fixes - given that the agent was the only one who knew of their actual names and designation. The months and meeting passed, most time Tevos had a schedule but on rare moments, one that Tevos herself appreciated, J would go and request for her too. It seemed like a fair turnaround.

Although Tevos had to cut short her monthly eXquisite meets to every other month or ever quarter since then, preferring to schedule with J, things had gone of smoothly enough, and when J was busy at least there was a back up for her pent up stress- although not the best, at least gave her a reprieve whenever she knew that a night with J would trump everything else.

Tevos turned from her position on the bed, embracing the human beside her who had wished her a form of Earth holiday, one she knew but didn't partake in, given the difference in customs. "Merry Christmas to you too. Do you believe in the religious teaching of your Earth holiday, or is this some jolly bearded man that fits chimneys?" she asked, moving up to kiss the nose above her.

She could hear the rumble on the humans chest "A little bit of both, what do asari have if not Christmas?" 

Tevos had to think at that - the asari did have their own cultural moments, but none that brought gifts to children, it didn't seem very practical given that the asari had many years of lifespan, some outgrow their childhood at forty, some still feel their maidenhood as if they weren't four hundred. She realized she must have thought a bit deeply because the woman beside her moved.

"Did I take too long thinking?" she asked.

The human laughed, and even though Tevos couldn't see, she could feel the hair move against her shoulder, a sign that the human was shaking her head 'no'. In fact, her human seemed to stretch outwardly as if trying to grab something before going back to their cuddling position. 

For a moment Tevos brow furrowed when she could feel the human hands fumble between their bodies, when her arm was taken and she could feel cool metal brush along her wrist- her human stopped, concern coating her voice.

"Are you okay Lea?" she asked.

Tevos breath hitched, and her mind suddenly went through a dozen scenarios in her head. The most plausible came to surface instantly, Christmas to humans was a day of giving gifts, this was probably a gift, but to the asari, wrists were usually considered only for bondmates - or at the very least close relationships. Sure she had a close relationship with J, they have been... in a pseudo together relationship for more almost two years now... it was possible this was not something the human was aware of.

"I... is this a Christmas gift?" she said, trying to hold her emotions together.

Her human smiled, and Tevos couldn't see it, but the brush of lips against her was obvious that her human was pleased. "Yeah it is. I... I'm sorry if it's a bit sudden. Would have given you flowers, but it might seem weird for you to go out of the room with flowers - others would see - and... and if I see an asari holding flowers, I'd know it was you. This seems..." her human scratched the back of her neck, an adorable thing to see, Tevos was sure of - if she would be given the gift to see it. "This seems like a good gift, you know? I won't see it if since I notice you keep wearing long sleeved clothes."

"I..." Tevos could feel the human deflate. No doubt she liked the gift, goddess she was pleased with it- but the ramification were also a little sudden, she had to remember the difference in asari and human lifespan. The year must have been long enough for the human. "I appreciate this. Thank you, J. It's just... do you know anything about asari jewelry?" she asked, settling her hand - not removing the bracelet - on a chest.

The rumble in the chest was her answer "Not very but, I notice you don't use much... is it bad?"

Tevos thought what she would say as she traced a familiar line of scars that decorated the humans chest towards the rib - it was a little favorite scar of hers, she knew that her human was a soldier- the scars and sometimes smoky gunshot scent lingered - though not unpleasant, had her associate the scent with security. "Well, bracelets are usually used by very good friends - or in extreme cases, by bondmates."

"Oh."

Tevos had to stifle a giggle. "Yes, oh."

"I... " the human started to sit up, and Tevos followed suit, she gave the human some space and time to adjust her thoughts, but reflexively, she held onto the bracelet, somehow unwilling to part with it even though she knew she should if J were to ask.

"I'm sorry Lea, I didn't know. I... bracelets are normal in the human customs, even to friends - and I..."

The asari councilor took mercy, it was an honest mistake - but also because it was very very sweet. "I shall keep it. Thank you J." 

A kiss was her thank you- and her christmas gift, at least for this year, was to make their one night into two.

* * *

**_Earth - First Quarter - 2183_ **

Shepard stared at the terminal, it had been a little less than a year since she had last interacted with Lea. Ever since she got wind of some special Turian / Human collaboration a year ago, she has since then been transferred under the decorated David Anderson and rose to the ranks of a full Commander, although she hadn't exactly heard from the asari, maybe busy who knows - Shepard hoped they were okay, wherever they are. 

There was never a lack of willing bodies, easy one night stands and casual hookups, but in her heart, Lea and her had shared a bond, a bond years in the making. She was only human after all, and even though it felt like wishful thinking on her part, Lea seemed to prefer her - in bed at least. A horrible pang of loneliness enveloped her- and then fear as what if one day she finds an asari with a familiar bracelet - as a casualty or as an enemy. She shook her head at that, battles have gone through her head more than the usual. 

"Commander Shepard." Anderson called and Shepard stood to salute before following Anderson towards the window where the Normandy was being held. "Tomorrow we set off, are you ready, child?" Shepard had found it endearing how Anderson called her child, although it had only been a year since she transferred under him, there was already a pretty solid bond that she knew would hold. Not only was Anderson a worthy higher up- but one whose principles and good deeds actually mirrored her own. It also helped he knew how to take on her sometimes hot headed attitude. She appreciated that.

"Yes Captain." she saluted again, which made the man in front of her chuckle. "No need to call me captain in private, Shepard." he said putting both of them at ease.

Shepard grinned "I wouldn't have, but you said Commander first."

"Ha. You're absolutely right. I did, didn't I?"

* * *

** _Citadel, A Week After the Normandy flew for a "shakedown run"  
_ _Human Embassies Office_ **

It had only been a few days since Shepard had last talked to Anderson regarding boarding the SSV Normandy. Now here she was saying goodbye to the Captain because she'll be out on a mission to be some sort of spectre - not only that, but there was now actually something looming over the horizon. She didn't know or understand it clearly - not with the geth throwing themselves at humans - and turning humans into husks, not when her brain was bogged down with memories she knew not of; but there was something they all had to be wary of, humans and aliens alike.

So why was this supposed Council of Superior Alien Races impossible to talk to?

"That councilor was hot wasn't she?" Kaidan spoke beside her - despite her fuming at the obvious favoritism the council had - especially the turian councilor with regards to 'obvious bad guy' Saren, Shepard's lips tugged upwards at Kaidan's remark. 

"Correction my friend, she _is_ hot. Just because they were of no help doesn't mean she's any less hot." Shepard laugh, much to her squad mates- especially the new Ashley Williams' chagrin.

**_Asari Councilor Office_ **

Thank the goddess Sparatus was too busy interacting with the turians - Saren included - that Tevos at least had the night to herself. No doubt the impassioned speech one Commander Jane Shepard had announced, together with a little army of her own - with known Captain David Anderson riled up many of what the council had no time to believe in - a rogue spectre, one that was beside them - the talks of geth, creatures who were not seen for hundreds of years, visions and protheans and carnage? They were all too crazy to be real.

It also would put more than the necessary problems on her plate. There was already a need to work with what to do on Nihlus' death, Tela Vasir - their own asari spectre had been MIA for a few moons now, - then there was a need for humanity and Shepard to prove that they not only deserved a seat on the council but also work on deserving to be a part of the spectre position. Many of these fell under her jurisdiction. Although she had always loved her work - sometimes an onslaught of work tended to make on tired easily - and given that it had been months since her last 'quiet evening trip' and longer still - almost a year since her human and her have had a chance to meet, Tevos now felt the need for release.

With a pained head, and a sure knowledge that things were only going to get worse, Tevos decided to let things be and pushed to send a message to Yavanna.

**_Yavanna - Location Somewhere Along The Inner Council Space_ **

It was technically a slow day out in the field, she had another escort to escort - one who was unfortunately running late. It would take her some time to check where they were and then she'll also have to calculate all the cost as well as to make sure to appease the client. She was about to go ahead and look for the escort until her work line beeped for an incoming 'platinum member' message.

Quickly she read the contents, it looked like the asari councilor had finally cracked and requested for 'any available personnel' to meet her ASAP for a private room in the Citadel. For the first time, the asari was playing near the home base, it was risky, but doable - definitely doable on her end, she should probably also drop by to find out what exactly the reason for Tevos' immediate need for release had to be, given that she had never experienced someone - much less an asari be impatient. 

Just as Yavanna scrolled through the available Citadel personnel, her other special line rang; the called ID was someone she didn't expect as well.

"Hey Yavanna. I think I need to score myself a Lea or something. Can you do me this favor? I'll send you the cut I'll get for Lea's and mine's next meet if that's possible? Just hope it's an asari - but I guess--" Shepard spoke through the other line, though slightly garbled, Yavanna knew that voice - and it was masked for security. It was the first time Shepard had asked to be the client rather than to specifically meet Tevos. Though she understood that there were times for needs, she wondered if she should charge Shepard the rate eXquisite meet does or give the human a bit of slack. 

Shepard continued to speak, her human tendency to ramble included even asking how 'Lea' was. Considering her options, Yavanna spoke, ignoring the questions of well-being Shepard had for 'Lea' it was obviously not part of her pay-grade. But having Shepard finally ask for something after all the money she made from the Commander? Why not. "Alright, give me your details and I'll see what I can do. You're a sweetheart after all."

The human on the other line snorted, but the smile was obvious in the lightness of tone. "I'm at the Citadel right now." At this Yavanna's eyes widened, and she tried her best not to laugh in giddy glee. "Things got a bit.. a lot- hectic today and I just... did you know the asari consort has a line 3 months long? That's insane."

At this Yavanna had to laugh, even Shepard on the other line laughed with her, although technically it's probably Shepard laughing at the absurdity of the consort's schedule rather than the fact that both Tevos and Shepard were in for a surprise of their lives.

With an excited smile, Yavanna sent a message to both Tevos and Shepard - and one for her ride, it seems like she had to get to the Citadel - fast.

**_The Next Evening - Citadel, Golden Moon Strip_ **

Citadel's Golden Moon was similar to Illiums Stateside, just a lot more subdued but just as high end, Shepard had to actually whistle given all the bells that was the theme of the area. She wondered if this one she requested would be worth it - it was her first time to request as a client after all. She checked her omnitool again, Golden Moon Luxe Hotel - Room 7-57sA. It was the second highest floor, and no doubt pricey, Shepard wondered if her 'rates' went up or if this was a mistake. The favor pulling in terms of this escort service was something she really needed to read about if she would do it again - if she would ever do it again.

Shepard climbed up, similar to the Stateside Towers floor in Illium, the hallway was dark, save for lights that once again reminded her of the relaxing ambiance. Once she reached the door, Shepard opened it with her omnitool - as she was the the one who requested, it would be preferred she arrive earlier that her 'partner'. Bathing herself once more in familiar darkness, Shepard noticed that unlike Illium's yellow, the smoky dim windows in Citadel were the color of violet.

Taking the available time she had to look around - Shepard peered out the window, she was so high up looking at the sky cars zooming past made them seem like bugs. She also noticed that unless one was really near the window, you would really not see any light reflected back, her hand had to at least be half a foot near the window for the violet light to finally put a faint glow in her hands.

Her musings were cut short when the door opened, and Shepard took the time to take a deep breathe, wait for the door to close before turning around - her silhouette would have been obvious by the window - and to keep true to her request with Yavanna, she would put herself back in the safety of the darkness. Quickly, she tapped her ear - and just as she did so, the newcomer tapped their ear as well, two pairs of orange lights glowed, and then, a set of clothes dropped as the newcomer removed hers.

Shepard quickly moved forward where the orange glow last once, and with practiced hands she sent the gods a thanks that it was obviously an Asari. Quickly, no words were spoken Shepard as picked the asari up and deposited her on the bed, throwing both of them on the covers with her above- she would take her pleasure, and then give, but first, she wanted to taste this ---

_Lavander... with hints of citrus..._

Shepard sniffed at the neck long and hard, her whole body went rigid for a second before it softened.

"Lea?"

* * *

As the elevator climbed in Golden Moon Luxe, Tevos could only hope her request would give her some kind of satisfaction, even just a portion of what J would usually give her. "Honestly Tevos, you have to stop it. You've been busy, you don't even know where J is, much more who is she is then why is it even important to compare?" Of course as she said this her hand also started playing with the bracelet she was given. Though she did not wear this specific bracelet on any normal council day, she would wear it when she had her dalliances - a little bit of peace of mind at best. 

When she opened the door and saw a silhouette, it surprised her that the escort was already there- it looked like Yavanna had one easily available at the Citadel; with quick practiced movements, Tevos closed her translator and removed her clothes - she didn't care what treatment she had today, as long as it gave her a little bit of release before diving back head on to work.

Strong hands suddenly enveloped her, and she had to stifle a gasp as she was thrown on the bed. Inwardly, she had already started smiling with excitement at the treatment she was going to get - but when the body in front of her started snuggling, and then a deep breath tickled her neck folds, Tevos' mind raced.

The body on top of her turned rigid, and when a voice spoke, a voice that spoke of home, and delicious, wonderful love making and safety - the bracelet on her arm seemed to be ten times heavier than normal.

"It's you..." the human above her breathed.   
  
Without waiting Tevos brought her hands up to embrace the woman, feeling the familiar traces of the face, the hair - a little longer than usual - resting just around the ears- was it her? Who else could it be? Somehow, some way, Yavanna was able to go above and beyond the usual. With a heave, Tevos used her strength to roll them both - now she was on top, and her fingers easily skimmed through the chest so familiar to her. Quickly she tried to pull the shirt off, not realizing there were buttons. Her hand shook - it was impossible, but the voice... her 'name' being called. Her shaky hands was met with human ones - also shaking as they were led to the buttons, and the hurry from a while ago came in spades.

Tevos felt the trapped heat from the chest emerge and she trailed one hand on the scar - so familiar--- it was her, _it was J._ _Her J._

Tevos dipped down, unable to listen to whatever it was J said, as she licked the scars and took a nipple in her mouth - already it stood in attention, even without the basic foreplay. It was her, it was J. This was home, the familiarity of the situation made her damp and all the more ready to feel.

J seemed like she was going to say something - no doubt the human would have questions, actually, she had questions of her own, questions as to why now? Why them? At the Citadel? Was Yavanna setting them up? Did J actually know who she was? 

Tevos tried to push the thoughts away, tried to push them away with the moans that were being sung in the room - but on J's third attempt to speak, Tevos placed a practiced - oh so effective nibble on the human's earlobe.

"I have the same questions as you, but first. I really really need you to make me cum."

* * *

**_Back to Present time: Year 2186, June - after the nth round of lovemaking._ **

"It's a little funny isn't it?" Shepard said as she stretched her body on the familiar bed, the familiar but not really asari, Lea beside her. "We've been together for how long now... almost 8 years? We kinda like... know each other but not really."

Tevos stirred from her position, easily wrapping her limbs around the body she had adored and the human she had started to address as truly her own. "You mean six years, my darling J." she laughed "Actually make it around five and a half at most. You were gone for quite some time, and I had honestly thought you had found a harem of asari wives to finally sate you."

Shepard laughed, she had spilled it quite a ways back to Lea that her ultimate dream was to have a group of asari wives - especially when they discussed more about Thessian culture and how Asari were communal people. Most are happy to live in their own little world of perfect families of two + children, but some of them - especially if they were of asari, did not mind groups as long as it was all consensual. Most asari know of their worth and know when to leave if the situation was unwarranted.

"But that would have made you sad wouldn't it? If I didn't come back?"

"Hmmm. I guess it would. You have grown on me quite a bit."

"So you were worried?"

"You are a little silly at times J. Of course I was worried. But sometimes I would prefer thinking that you were happy somewhere rather than dead. I know you're a soldier and... things could always turn sideways." 

Shepard quieted at that. Lea was right, it would have been better if she was married, but no - she was actually dead. If Shepard was the one awake and Lea had gone dark for two years, what could have happened? She would no doubt be worried, a year, maybe a year and couple of months... two years? That was more than what a normal human could easily wait for. She would also hope that Lea would be happy somewhere - not bunched up in work - even though work made Lea happy too. At least she was safe. There was so many that had happened during her time with Cerberus that things just felt out of the loop.

Disappointing Kaidan, not being an Alliance, the pressure and aloofness of the council on her 'pseudo position' as a spectre, Liara's obvious distress and unwillingness to share anything anymore. So so much had happened, but when she did come back to talk to Yavanna, a message she sent out of the blue, a message came back within hours - and a schedule was set up within that week itself. It was funny how it all happened, it was a little scary at first, going back to a dark room, being unsure and afraid - but there it was, and Lea - everything just felt right, as if two years hadn't passed - at least not for her.

There was a certain urgency during that lovemaking a year ago, and Shepard would never say this, but she knew Lea had wished her well and thanked her Goddess that she was alive and back - that she wasn't dead - and Shepard couldn't help but admit that maybe - maybe she had been falling in love.

Soft hands brushed her cheeks and Shepard turned towards the face in the darkness. "You seem to have been deep in thought again. You've always been deep in thought most of the times recently." she heard Lea said, concern coating the voice.

Shepard sighed, she was right, ever since she came back to Lea's safety arms - within Cerberus and after Cerberus, nothing had been easy. She had already started having feelings years before, but then Liara had came, she died, she was given a new lease on life, Liara left, Samara came, Liara came back, Samara left, now Liara had her child - their child - no just her child. She had yet to open her heart to a child during wartime. No doubt she knew she would care and protect the little babe in Liara's almost erupting belly, but it seems like when that day comes, when the babe comes out - her first child... she'll have to really say goodbye.

Goodbye to Lea.

"It would have been nice to think we'd push ten years, Lea." Shepard said wistfully, for the first time ever, she was glad of the darkness - in a way that Lea would never see the turmoil in her face or the way she held her fists tightly.

Shepard felt the asari move, kneeling behind her on the bed as soft smooth hands delicately massaged her shoulders and back. Shepard once again had to stifle a choke, it was endearing, almost domestic, Liara would have done the same. Liara... her child... Liara was almost nine months pregnant now. The days seemed so fast as they tried to win a war- find a way to win the war at least. This - this meeting with Lea was once long overdue, or maybe... it was just a way because she knew she had to say goodbye.

There was a quiet peace that passed Shepard who was lost in her thoughts. Time passed and the easing massage she received halted, slender arms wrapped around the humans neck as the asari's bust met firm and scarred back. Tevos pressed her head beside the humans - her chin cradled on the humans shoulder as she kissed and nibbled the neck lovingly, taking a deep breath to instill with her the scent of safety and dare she say it....  
  
"You say that as if you are saying goodbye." Tevos said. She said it even though she had feared the worst- she didn't want to think about love, even if it was there - it was impossible to at least not feel care, but then years had piled up, one on top of the other, dalliances and moments were extended for each other- snippets of life, no matter how doctored where shared. It was impossible not to at least have some interest of what a future could have been.

When J did not speak, Tevos smiled against the neck she was busy snuggling herself against. She wasn't an asari for nothing. Lovers come and pass, although she would be lying to herself if J did not turn important to her. She understood even if it did pain her. She had always been afraid, afraid for J if there came a time she would perish, as humans and soldiers were prone to be. When J would never contact her again because she had a family, because work had pressed them into different parts of the galaxy. So many other possibilities could have happened, and yet, no matter how many months or even years it took, they came back into each others arms.   
  
"Has she said yes?" she asked again, making sure she was channeling her inner citadel councilor tone as to make her at least a bit more dignified with the goodbye.

Shepard bristled for a moment before shaking her head "She's actually waiting for me to say yes."

"What's stopping you?" It would be funny if J said it was her, though Lea doubted her human would. That would have been more affronting than anything else. They knew their roles, whatever it was stayed in the darkness. She was the asari councilor, to be with a human soldier - probably Alliance, hopefully- not Cerberus - it would complicate matters too much. 

"I just... I think you know there's a war coming right? A big one - I... I'm a soldier, her mom's a part of the war too - heck we all are. I just... I just don't want to bring a child into the war not knowing if I'm getting out of it alive - or I mean..." Shepard stilled, words pouring out of her, Lea had always been able to do this - had always been able to undo her and let her spill her deepest secrets. No judgement just understanding - "I know i'll protect her, and her mom but I'm just scared.... I'm scared, Lea."

Lea listened, what could she say? In the ramble her human said it was much of a goodbye as it was. A family, an asari at that - it seemed, a child on the way, a goodbye for her... due to this - in this case - their, part in the war, a goodbye - just a goodbye for them. The home that they had felt for each other had no place in war- it even had no place in reality.

The bed moved again, and this time Shepard felt Lea stand up and move in front of her, wrapping her scaled legs on her torso as a firm bum sat on her crossed thighs, Shepard moved to settle both of them comfortable, as once again Lea wrapped her hands against her nape - if the lights were on she was sure Lea would be trying to look into her eyes. With the realization that she was truly saying goodbye, Shepard knew that it would pain her more than anything - with a tug, Shepard crushed the asari in a hug and once again their body merged one - two - many more times that night.

Both of them knew, in the last vestiges of their lovemaking- when both were spent, mentally and physically, they had also finally spent the last of their emotional feelings as sweet nothings were truly not nothing anymore and words of love were finally uttered under the guise of a 'quiet evening trip'.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This makes me sad.  
> I love Tevos, and maybe it's because she's as much as a blank slate as she could be - though we know she's the softer - diplomatic councilor, it's just - wonderful possibilities. I love her so much.


End file.
